The monkey was away in Vegas and I missed him. I checked my E-mail account and got this E-mail that mentioned Nyerere in the title. I thought it was from one of my friends in Tanzania and opened it. Hmmm maybe I could have some fun here…..
13th February Steff Nyerere to Steve Irwin:
I do foresee the surprise this letter will bring to you as it comes from a stranger. But be rest assured as it come with best of intentions. However, your address was courtesy of a business journal at the World trade Center in Johannesburg. But after due consideration from your profile, I became aware and assured of your credibility of handling this trust and my future. Thus, after my humble decision to solicit your understanding and co-operation in this transaction, as it will be beneficial to all of us involved.
My name is steff Nyerere from Tanzania. I am the son of the late President of Tanzania Julius Nyerere, who died four years ago. My father used his position then to make for himself and us some fortune. My father died after a protracted illness.
I was studying overseas when my father died and I was forced to return for the funeral. His attorney notified me the "WILL" prepared by my late father in his chamber that he had used his position then to make some money, which he brilliantly transferred and deposited it with a private Security Company here in Johannesburg, Republic of South Africa. He deposited this consignment as valuables. The security Company does not know that this consignment contains cash money, except the attorney and me.
The amount is twenty four Million United States Dollars(US$24Million).However, my aim of contacting you is to help me and take this sum into your nominated account in your country or any other part of the world. Secondly, you will also help me look for a profitable investment overseas because I don't have knowledge of international investments. As a result of my present situation, I won't be able to conclude this transaction alone. If you are interested in helping me out, try and contact me with the current email or my telephone number +(27-83-208-4334)or+ PLEAS COMTACT ME true THIS E-MAILADDRESS (firstname.lastname@example.org)indicating your interest to help me. I will then furnish you with more details. I have mutually agreed to compensate you with 25% of the total sum for your assistance, 5% for expenses that might be incurred in the course of the transaction. Then the remaining 70% will remain for me and my family, which you will help us invest.
Be informed that this transaction needs utmost trust and confidentiality.
Note also that the transaction attracts no risk on your side hence all the modalities for safe, smooth and successful transaction have been arranged by me.
Looking forward to receive your urgent reply. God bless you.
STEFF NYERERE.(FOR THE FAMILY.)
contact me as soon as you can on this TELEPHONENUMBER +0027-83-2084334,or you give me your telephone cotact so that i will get back to you as urgent it is.
Note: He didn’t even put a name just Dear….I am dealing with a lazy scammer here! Since I am in Australia I thought it would be fun to say I was the most annoying Australian. Here goes hope I make you proud monkey!
13th February Steve Irwin to Steff Nyerere:
My name is Steve Irwin and I am a zoo keeper from Australia. Thanks you for your E-mail and kind words I was very surprised to hear that people have heard of me and seen my television show in Africa. Then again you do have a lot of crocodiles out there. Are they beautiful ones? I just love crocodiles. They are lovely creatures although sometimes they get a bit angry if they are a feisty one.
I am sorry to hear about your father’s death. I heard he was a great man that did many wonderful things for you country.
I am interested in doing business with the son of such a noble man. I don't normally trust strangers because my Mum told me not to but as you are the son of an important person I will make an exception. I could really use some money right now. I am keen to open my own zoo and hope you would be interested in being a partner in this business. I hope you are interested in animal conservation. We could do great things together Steff. Let me know your thoughts on this,
Friday 13th February Steff Nyerere to Steve Irwin:
Subject: Re: PLEASE REPLY SOON!
Date: Fri, 13 Feb 2004 03:48:56 -0800 (PST)
I AM VERY GRATEFUL THAT YOU HAD CONSIDERED TO HELP MY FAMILY AND I IN THIS OUR PROBLEM. HOWEVER I AM INTERESTED IN THE PROPOSAL FOR ZOO BUSINESS TOGETHER WITH YOU.
BUT FISRT THINGS FIRST AS I KNOW THAT YOU WILL BE VERY CAPABLE TO HANDLE THE INVESTMENT WHEN THE MONEY GETS TO YOUR COUNTRY. FOR US TO PROCEED YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THE PROCESS OF THE TRANSACTION AS MY LAWYER HAS ARRANGED FOR THE SAFE AND SMOOTH TRANSFER OF THE MONEY.FOR THIS TRANSACTION YOU NEED TO EFFECT A SHORT VISIT TO SOUTH AFRICA TO ENABLE THE BANK OFFICERS TO OPEN A NON- RESIDENT BANK ACCOUNT IN YOUR NAMES THROUGH WHICH THE MONEY WILL BE DEPOSITED, BEFORE TRANSFER OF THE MONEY INTO THE ACCOUNTS THAT YOU WILL PROVIDE. YOUR VISIT WHICH WILL LAST FOR FOUR WORKING DAYS WILL ALSO ENABLE US TO SIGN OUR AGREEMENT AND DISCUSS ON OUR INVESTMENT AS WELL.DURING YOUR VISIT WE WILL TAKE DELIVERY OF THE BOX,TAKE WHAT EVER MONEY THAT WE MAY NEED DEPOSIT THE BALLANCE INTO THE NON-RESIDENT DOLLAR ACCOUNT THAT IS OPENED FOR YOU FOR ONWARD TRANSFER INTO YOUR ACCOUNTS IN YOUR COUNTRY. PLEASE I WOULD LIKE YOU TO CONFIRM THE FOLLOWING DETAILS TO ENABLE US PROCEED IMMEDIATELY AS WE DO NOT NEED TO DELAY FURTHER, HENCE THE BOX IS ACCUMULATING MORE CHARGES AND I DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH CASH AT HAND.THEREFORE I WOULD APPRECIATE YOUR EXPEDITE OF ACTION TOWARDS YOUR SCHEDULED VISIT AND IN CONCLUDING THE TRANSFER SOON.NOTE THAT MY FAMILY AND I WILL BE MIGRATING TO AUSTRALIA AS SOON AS THE TRANSFER IS COMPLETED AND HOPES THAT YOU WILL ACCOMODATE AND ASSIST US TOO IN THIS REGARDS.
1/FULL NAME AND POSTAL ADDRESS
2/PASSPORT COPY OR DETAILS
PLEASE DO NOT FAIL TO CONTACT ME URGENTLY WITH THE ABOVE MENTIONED DETAILS AND ALSO YOU SHOULD CONFIRM YOUR WILLINGNESS TO VISIT AS INDICATED AND WHEN.YOU MAY AS WELL CONTACT ME DIRCETLY ON MY DIRECT NUMBERS - 0027-83-249-6778 FOR FURTHER DISCUSSION
I WAIT EAGERLY FOR YOUR CALL OR IMMEDIATE RESPONSE TO MY MAIL.
Friday 13th February Steve Irwin to Steff Nyerere:
How’s it going mate? It has been a bonza day today. One of the beautiful crocodile mummy’s babies hatched today. Three little boys we have named them Julius after you Daddy, hoax, because at first we thought that little one was a girl and teeny weeny, because he was very small. We are hoping that teeny weeny will survive. Please remember him in your prayers.
My beauty of a wife Terry handles all the money in our house cause she is the brains in the marriage. Not that I am the beauty, cause I'm rough as guts mate! I thought you might like to see a picture of me so I attached one of me and the croc mother and one of me and my beauty of a wife Terry. I would love to see a picture of you and your family Steff.
I come from a long line of crocodile hunters. My Grandpa was called Iva Irwin and he was known as the croc wrestler. He tried to take on a huge one and was ripped to shreads back in '59. My Grandma was Ima Irwin and she used to tell me bedtime stories about Grandpa's encounter with the croc. God rest their souls.
So Steff do you have any children? I have two little ones Bindi and Bob, they love playing with animals. Do you like animals Steff mate? What is your favourite animal? It is important to me that my partner in the zoo has a love for animals is dead keen to get involved in conservation projects.
Speaking of South Africa Terry and I have been planning a trip to South Africa to make a documentary about snakes. We wanna get footage of boomslag, black mambas and the snouted cobra. My daughter Bindy thinks snakes are wee rippers. Have you had many encounters with snakes Steff mate? Hey maybe you could be our snake handler at the new zoo? What do ya reckon?
Can't wait till you arrive in Australia, let us know when you will be arriving so we can throw another shrimp on the barbie for you.
Hear from you soon mate,
Note: Thought I would add in a couple of “family” pics for Steff!
Tuesday 17th February 2004 Steff to Steve Irwin:
I wonder if your little crocodile survived, cause we realy prayed for it to be ok.It was nice seing you and your family in the picture attached too. I will send mine soon as I establish your seriousness in this transaction.
I do not intend to take part in the day to day running of the reserve if we should go into partnership as every thing will be under your care provided it will be profit oriented.I hope you do understand as I will be advancing for my masters study in business management for now.
As i indicated in my last mail you need to intimate me of your intension to proceed with the transaction and as arranged by my lawyer. In your mail to me you did not mention about your willingness to visit here for the transaction and also to confirm your details to enable us proceed immediately.
I need to hear from you immediately for further action with regards to the transfer process.You are to send your direct phone numbers and details and you may contact me on -0027-83-249-6778. My regards to your family and all your animals.
Note: He mailed me back; I had almost given up hope. I thought maybe the croc story was going too far! Looks like he is not keen on being the snake wrangler. Hmm how about I offer him a wife?
Tuesday 17th February 2004 Steve Irwin to Steff:
Pity that you won't be able to take part in the running of the zoo but crikey Steff, I was impressed to hear you will be doing a masters in business studies. You must be real smart. I never finished school, myself. When your finished maybe you and Terry can handle all the business side of the zoo. I prefer to hang out with all the beautiful animals.
Terry and I are dead keen to go to South Africa and as I mentioned before we plan to make a documentary there. We are making plans to leave as soon as we can get together a camera team.
Terry is here with me and she is telling me off for getting really excited and not giving you our details. Sometimes I get a bit carried away. Here they are:
Steve and Terry Irwin
C/O Queensland Zoo
PO Box 295
We don't have a fax here Steff mate as we don't use them here in Australia. If you need to send documents please scan them and send them via E-mail.
All the baby crocs are well thanks. I have told Teeny Weeny, Hoax and Julius all about you.
What kind of animal is you favourite? You didn't answer this before. Do you have a wife mate? If not I know a nice Aussie sheila who would be prefect for a smart man like yourself. Can't wait till you arrive. We'll see you right mate.
Tuesday 17th February, Message from Steff to Steve Irwin:
Subject: Dear Steve, (URGENT SOON!)
Date: Tue, 17 Feb 2004 05:12:31 -0800 (PST)
It was quite hoax as you indicated having to name your little reptile after my fathers. but it was interesting to hear. But I must tell you that that rearing animals are not my favourite but I am interested on the business side of it. I hope you do understand me and will accept it that way.
I do like ostritch, and pig and giraf, stange is'nt it.I've got a girl friend and we leave to gether too.I must also let you know that it is not posiible for me to visit Australia until the transfer is completed and was hoping as arranged for the transaction that you should be the one to visit South Africa firt to enable us complete the transfer of the money, hence we will all go back together.
Please confir to me urgently of your intention as I do not need to waist more time towards this arrangement as I do not have enough cash at hand for more charges at the security company. I received your details as address, dont you have phone as well. You can contact me at least on my cell phone- 0027-83-249-6778 for discussion.
Waiting to hear from you soon.
Note: My heart skipped a beat when I read the first sentence but phew, it looks like he still has no idea. Time to bring in the code names
Wednesday 18th February Message from Steve Irwin to Steff:
Thanks for your E-mail, I understand that looking after animals is not everyone’s cup of tea. It is great to know that a smart educated man like yourself will be involved in the business. I am glad you like some animals. We can be sure to get a pig, ostrich and giraffe. I want to make sure that you are happy with our zoo.
I was delighted to hear that you liked us honouring the memory of your father by naming our young croc after him. All the crocs are doing well and they send their love to you.
I was sorry to hear you have a girlfriend. I was hoping to be able to give you a nice white Australian wife. The lady I had in mind is a multi-millionaire and very attractive. I thought it would be fun for the four of us to go on double dates together. If you split up with your girlfriend let me know.
Steff I am most worried about you. I think we need to get you out of Tanzania as soon as possible. I was talking to someone about your late father, may he rest in peace, and they said that there were rumours that he was murdered.
Steff, I watch a lot of TV and understand all about conspiracy theories. Did you know Princess Dianna was murdered? Someone could be reading this E-mail right now!!! The head zoo keeper Mr Squiggle is a bit of a dodgy character and I am worried he could get access to this computer and find out what we are planning. I have always suspected Mr Squiggle is a dangerous man.
I have given this a great deal of thought and hardly slept a wink last night. I would like to honour the memory of my late grandparents and new life, my little crocs so from now on I am going to call you Iva Teeny Weeny and you can call me Ima Hoax. I have opened a new E-mail account which honours the memory of your late father, you are to E-mail at from now on. The address is friend_of_Julius@hotmail.com. I suggest that you do the same and create a new account to protect the privacy of this transaction.
As you can see I am taking this business very seriously and will do anything to protect our future investment. I will E-mail you from the new account later. Once we have established the code names and new E-mail accounts we can work out how to get that money to you.
Note: Mr Squiggle is an iconic children’s television character in Australia. (See pic)
Can’t wait to use those code names so better send him one from the new account.
Wednesday 18th February Message from Ima Hoax (Steve Irwin) to Iva Teeny Weeny (Steff)
Just a little message from this more secure E-mail account. Please use this one in future.
Thursday 19th February Message from Steff to Ima Hoax (Steve Irwin)
From: NYERERE &FAMILY <email@example.com>
To: Ima Hoax <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Subject: Re: This is my new account
Date: Wed, 18 Feb 2004 02:13:59 -0800 (PST)
I NEED TO INFORM YOU THAT I AM NOT IN TANZANIA NOW AS I HAVE MIGRATED TO SOUTH AFRICA, AND PRECENTLY I AM IN JOHANESBURG.
I STILL WONDER IF YOU CAN BE ABLE TO HELP ME
I WAIT FOR YOUR MESSAGE
NOTE: The same message appeared in both my E-mail accounts. Looks like he is desperate to get things moving, so lets play up the conspiracy angle a little!
Thursday 19th February Message from Ima Hoax (Steve Irwin) to Iva Teeny Weeny (Steff)
Flaming galahs! What are you doing!!! You have forgotten to use the code. You are going to blow our cover, mate. Now of all times it is most important to ensure the security of this transaction. You have skipped the country so things must be bad! Crikey, do you think you were followed? Did they try to murder you? How did you get out safely?
Of course I am prepared to help you but only if you stick to the rules and use the code. It is for your own safety mate. You must also get a new E-mail address right now. Do you understand Iva, RIGHT NOW!! Don't mail me from your regular account I think our communications could be traced. I've always fancied myself as a bit of a 007 and here we are right in the middle of my own conspiracy. Hmm don't think Terry would like it if I was surrounded by girls. Are there lots of girls in South Africa, Iva?
I am very concerned for you please E-mail as soon as possible.
Sunday 22nd February, Message from Terry Irwin to Steff
I heard nothing for several days so I decided to send Steve on a little trip and send Steff an E-mail from Steve’s wife Terry.
My name is Terry Irwin and I am Steve's wife. This morning I woke up to discover Steve gone, simply leaving a note to say he was concerned about you and he was going to catch a plane. I am very worried about my husband as he was carrying a large sum of cash and a gun. Steve is a very excitable man as you will know. He was looking forward to beginning his venture in a new zoo with you.
He was most upset that you have not contacted him in the last few days. His note stated that he was going to go and save you and he hoped it was not too late. Steve really admired you and even though your friendship has been short I can tell you mean a lot to him, I mean he even named one of the crocs after you.
If you hear anything from him please contact me urgently. If I hear nothing from either you or Steve in the next 24 hours I will contact my brother, Bobby, who works for Interpol. (The international police) I know that you stated in a previous E-mail that your business with him was strictly confidential but if both of your lives are in danger I will have no choice but to ask Bobby to intervene and to send him all of your E-mails.
If you see Steve tell him that I send my love and to contact me ASAP.
Friday 27th February Long Legged Red to Steff
OK time to let him down. I think I will break it to him nice and gently. I called this message “Monkeying Around”
I am writing to you to thank you for trying to scam me. I had a lovely time pretending to be Steve Irwin. I hope you enjoyed playing Steff Nyerere.
I thought it might be nice to direct you to some of your colleagues work. The following website might be of interest in terms of your professional development. Maybe you could find a mentor, like mine the Ebola Monkey Man.
Anyway go to this site and click on the monkey pox’s section. We are both famous now.
Tell all your friends to drop me a line so we can play too.
Lots of love and kisses,
Long Legged Red