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Original Message

Sir/Madam

It's my pleasure to send you this mail which I hope you will treat as highly confidential. I am PRINCE SOKI MOBUTU, son of the late President Mobutu SeseSekou of Zaire, new Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC). There is war going on in my
country and so my family members escaped to Morocco while I am presently at Zambia/Zimbabwe boarder monitoring events. Due to the present crises, it is not save to put any investment in my country and besides most of my father's properties and account have been seized by the government of Laurent Kabila who died earlier last year. Now, I want to set up an investment overseas and I have about US$21 million (Twenty one million United States dollars) set aside for this project, I decided to contact you to help me in setting up a good investment, but I would not want my name or family name to be used. I am prepared to offer you 10% of the total sum if you assist me in claiming the fund from the security vault in Holland where my father deposited the box containing the fund as gemstones, gold, and jewelry before his death. Please contact me if you are interested and capable of helping by sending your telephone/fax numbers for me to reach you because I cannot receive any international call for now due to my condition, so that I can send the documents regarding to claiming of this fund. This will be handed over to as the family foreign partner.

Reach me through my e-mail address,

sokimobutu2003@win4wales.com,
sokimobutu@123.com,
sokimobutu@yahoo.com or
sokimobutu2003@yahoo.com

Best regards,
PRINCE SOKI MOBUTU

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Sept. 15

Dear Prince Soki Mobutu,

Hello. My name is Mike. Sorry I didn't get back to you sooner but I haven't checked my email in awhile. Your proposal sounds very interesting to me and I want to help. Let me tell you something about myself and then you can decide if you want to work with me.

I work in the music industry. I'm hoping to cut an album with my boy B-Smooth later next month. I was thinking that if I helped you get this money, then I would have enough to cover our expenses and even make a music video.

What do you think?

Thanks

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 15

Hello Mike,

Thanks for your mail which I found interesting as well. The zeal to assist me to recover this money from the Security Company. Please I emplore you to send your telephone/fax number to enable us communicate effectively since we cannot discuss everything through the internet. This will give me the opportunity as well sending you the 'CERTIFICATE OF DEPOSIT' as well as map out the modalities or ways we can assist each other.
Thanks for your co-operation so far while expecting your urgent reply to enable us start the processing of the papers involved.

Best regards,

Prince Soki Mobutu

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: He found my response interesting. I thought it was your run-of-the-mill reply from a gangsta rapper.

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Sept. 15

For sure. Can't do everything through the net. My fax number is 1-270-964-9576. You can hit me up at that number or text me. I look forward to getting your fax.

Peace,

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 16

Michael,

I am happy that you are still with me, but you will have to accept the fact that we need to much more closer to make this thing work right.

Send me your phone numbers and then I will call you.

Regards,

Soki.

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Sept. 16

What's up playa? I got your message. I'm straight telling you, the sky is the limit on how much money we could make. I'm going to have my business partner, B-Smooth, email you. He handles a lot of the business deals. It's important that I be honest with you so I'm just telling you to expect an email from him. You can trust him as he is my partner. It's also important that I keep my street credibility. Anyway, here are my contact numbers:

Celly: 877-224-1484

Fax: You have it.

Email: Killa_mik@hotmail.com

Shout me a holla dawg.

Yours truly,

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: The Profanator's email for B-Smooth comes across as Benjamin Horowicz.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 16

Yo Yo Yo, B-Smooth is in the Hizzy!

Whatup dawg? My boy Mike told me to get wit you on the subject of buzzi-nizzi. Mike and I rap in the same group Foe-on Nine; he is the gangstaz gangsta and I am the brains. Anyway, we are looking to make it big wit our music and we always need money to make it through. It sounds like you got the bling, baby!

Black Mic is so hip with the times and I am still kickin' it old school. He talks about his Celly phizzone whereas my motto is "page my ass." Word. You can leave a message for him or send me text, nigga.

be in touch, man. Let me know what we have to do.

peace out,

B-Smooth

PROFANATOR NOTE: Great -- here I am, an Englishman, playing an American white kid, who is emulating a gangsta rapper. Am I missing anything, Monkey?

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: I think you make a great gangsta rapper.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 17

Hello Ben,

I got something like an email but to tell you the fact, i was unable to understand all the slangs, please, break it down for me.

Regards,

Soki.

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: OMFG

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 17

Mike,

Okay, i wait for email from your friend, tell him to email me right away.

Regards,

Soki.

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Sept. 17

Soki,

Fo sure. I'm a hit him up on his two way right now.

Peace,

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 19

Mike,

Just tell your friend to send me his addres and I will send him the Certificate of depoist of the cargoes.

Regards,
Soki.

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Sept. 19

Soki,

What's cracking playboy? Did you want his home address too? If you want, you can fax the documents to our fax machine at 877-224-1484. You can also email them if you want. Either of those will be much faster than mailing them.

We are performing at the Roxy tonight. The show is going to be off the hook. I wrote this new rhyme yesterday. Check out the chorus of the song:

"I want the cash, yo girl, the gin, the juice
I want some head, some ass, yo car, your gold tooth
I shoot a honky, his motha, his sister, his friend
I wake up the next day and I shoot him again
Cuz it's like that. YEAH!!!!!! I don't play
Shot up a school yard of honkies, just the other day
And the po po's, they can't catch me
They just mad because Black Mic done stole their TV"

Yeah, I'm still playing with the words. This song could be huge though. By the way, do you like rap music? I never asked you. Can you tell me about yourself?

Yours truly,

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: Well, I probably won't win "Best Rap Song" at the MTV awards. What can you do?

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 19

Soki,

Yo yo yo, B-Smooth is in the hizzy!

Whatup, playa? I am sad for a few reasons, dawg. But I am happy that you want me to break it down! Dude, you know me and Black Mic are bustin' rhymes, try real hard, you will catch on.

Man, I am sorry about not being in touch, I have been bustin ass trying to get our new demo cut. Black Mic sent me the mail he sent you, and I copied his ass on this. Black Mic, if you are reding, don't give out the lyrics till I say so, dawg...

Tell you what homie, I'm gonna relate to this bizznizz then drop a rhyme on your head. I think Mike sent you his fax and phone numbers. Send over your papers via these and I will check them before we proceed. Just make sure you keep in touch with both of us. Word, dawg. What do you need from me? We really wanna help so that we can invest in our music. I wish you could hear some.

A'ight brother. Representin' we are gonna play this at the Roxy show tonight... I think we are gonna use Mike's lyrics too:

Nine inchiz-o-nigga

Yo yo yo Foe-on-Nine all up in this m/f

(MC B-Smooth)
"My name's b-smooth, b-phresh, b-phat
wid a rocket in my pocket and a clip in my gat.
My man's Black Mic, he's hard as shit
On the mic he be firing and you're gonna get hit.
Us bad motherfuckers are way too much to take
we're dope, we're phat, we're rough for fuck's sake.
We'll rhyme and steal so hard you'll get indigestion
take a look in our pockets we're up for posession,
Cause we ain't new to the toke or smoke scene,
We been rollin' supremes since the age of fourteen"

(Chorus)
What-what-what's that sensation
nine inchiz-o-nigga biatch relatin'

I said: what, what, what's that sizzynizzy,
nine inchiz o nigga up in my bizzi.

BLACK MIKE IS IN THE HOUSE

(MC Black Mic)
"I want the cash, yo girl, the gin, the juice
I want some head, some ass, yo car, your gold tooth
I shoot a honky, his motha, his sister, his friend
I wake up the next day and I shoot him again
Cuz it's like that. YEAH!!!!!! I don't play
Shot up a school yard of honkies, just the other day
And the po po's, that can't catch me
They just mad because Black Mic done stole their TV"


Be in touch brother, respect...

B-Smooth

PROFANATOR NOTE: Where is the damn envelope? How far can be push this, Monkey? P.S. Mine are worse than yours.

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 23

Mike,
Sorry that I have not been able to contact you ever since the last email you sent me. Joseph Kabila, sent some people after me. He wants to kill me so I am hiding right now.

I will find away to send you the contact of the Security firm in Spain so that you will contact them.

Regards,

Soki

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Sept. 23

Soki,

No problem. Dude, this shit sounds serious as a mutha. If you need a place to stay, you can come out to Killa Cali (California) and chill with me and B-Smooth. This Kabila mutha fucka wouldn't dare mess with my crew. Me and B-Smooth are South Side Crips. Crips run these streets. You are my boy so technically, you an honorary member of the Crips. I would just tell my crew (Tre Bone, D-Shot, Vanilla Sherbert, Big O Face, Lil Biggie, Preston, and Token) to have your back. If you need to come here to hide, just let me know. I think you would get along with all my homeboyz. We could even teach you to Crip Walk like a true OG.

Get us the stuff from Spain Soki and get over to the US. This Kabila dude can't do shit to you over here. I put that on my life. I'm a call B-Smooth and tell him yo situation. Let me know if you need anything.

Yours truly,

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: Ahh shit! Soki got his hand on his gun cuz Kabila got him on the run. See, I can rap.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 23

Yo Soki,

Who is this mothafucka Joseph Kabila that be frontin' on my nigga? I am sure my boy Black Mic agrees so I don't mind speaking for him: you want us to fuck that biatch up? Nobody fucks with my boy. Nobody. Don't you worry, Soki, you say the word and we'll bust caps in that biatches ass. Who is he? Are you Ok?

Let me know.

B-Smooth

P.S. Soki sounds like a Japanese name. Are you yakuza? Do you have your ass in the middle of some international gangsta shizzi? Send me your picture, brother. I'd love to see my new friend.

Prince Soki to Black Mic cc to B-Smooth, Sept. 24

Michael,

I am okay, Kabila is too small to kill me, I will send you my photos tomorrow, I have gone to photo shop to take a shot.

What i require from you now is your address so that the Certificate of Deposit of the cargoes will be sent to you. Then I will send you the keys, so you should send same,e address. The keys will be sent to you via diplomatic courier. You will receive then before you contact Spain to pick up the cash. Find below the attachment, those are the photos of the boxes taken before they were dispatched to Spain.

To send you the keys, I will require from you the sum of $800, I am at this moment at the boader town of Gbongan in Cameron. I will move into Calabar in Nigeria within the next few days. Once in that Country, then I will be safe. I am an African , I am a black man. I am not a Japanese.

Please, send me the address and the fund for the dispatch of the keys to you.

Regards,

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 24

Yo Soki:

Easy-E was small, but he still kicked ass! Please don't hesitate to ask Black-Mic and myself for backup. The Southside Crips are cool as ice and twice as hard. If this Kabila cat is trouble, you let us know. For instance, our boyz Cole-sore, DJ Sogay, and Deze B.I.G. Goniez, are all perfectly equipped to kick Kabila's ass.

Man, your last e-mail was whack! I ha no idea you were getting undercover on everybody's ass. Keep moving brother, word. As regardin' this transaction, chill brother. Are you saying we need to go to Spain? I will gladly travel to that mothafucka to get those cases full of bling! Bling=money by the way, Black-mic said I needed to break down what I meant for you. So, for yo' RE
ass, I am saying that we will go to Spain to get the money. We love those pictures of the money!

So, you need our address to send the certificate of deposit? Scan that bad boy in and send it by e-mail. And you need to send us the Keys by Courier? For that our address is:

Foe-on Nine Music
187 Phelatio Way
Compton
Los Angeles, California 90210
USA

Now what is of this $800 you need to send the keys? Tell your people to take it out of the consignment when we get it. Either that, or we can front you the money. Black Mic and I have been talking. We think you are a friend and we were so happy to hear that you were a brotha and not a Japanese motha. Cause we consider you a friend, we want you to help us with our demo CD design. We are getting pictures of our friends holding signs with our group's name on it for our album. We would be more than happy to give you the $800 dollars for you to send us a picture of you holding a sign that says "Foe-on Nine all over this muthafucka!" This sign must say this exactly. Seeing as you are goin' to get your photo taken, this shouldn't be a problem, playa! The money won't be a problem after we are rich!

We got a suprise for you homie... We wrote you a song that we are gonna play tonight at the Foxy Lady Show. We love ya bro, and if you need help with Kabila, let us know. Here is the song, please send us the picture to go with the words!

SOKI BE OUR NIGGA

-Rant-

(B-Smooth)
Yo Black Mic, I'm about ready to kick this mutha-fucka. Are you ready to kick this mutha-fucka?

(Black Mic)
Black Mic in da house.

(B-Smooth)
What time is it Black Mic? Tell me what mutha-fuckin time it be...

(Black Mic)
Time to bust on they bitch asses.

-Verse 1-

(B-Smooth)

It be time for correction, time to get rude, rockin' and rhymin' with Black Mic and B-Smooth. time to kick some ass, bust a cap in your head should'a come clean, now your better off dead. A bitch named Kabila's frontin' Soki Mobutu Frontin' and jumpin' , who the fuck are you? Prince Soki is our nigga so back off little bitch or we'll fuck with yo ass like some honky girl's tits.

-Chorus-

Soki's kick's ass like Darth fuckin' Vader puttin' it to bitches with an ebony lightsaber

Soki is a gangsta bustin' caps till you fall when he runs out of bullets he'll throw the gat like a ball

-Rant-

(B-Smooth)
Yo, Black Mic, I'm sure you got some shit to say about our boy.

(Black Mic)
Black Mic in da house. Let me spit my verse.

-Verse 2-

I stomp on Kabila like fuckin gorilla he'll take a beating worse than the thrilla in manilla
I swoop down on him like a laser guided hawk-eye
fuck the car, I'll do a motha fucking walk-by
Cuz if you mess with Mobutu than you mess with us
South Side Crips ain't affraid to buss
B-Smooth and Black Mic, we be creepin on the low-key
spending trunks of money with motha fucka Soki
and we won't hesitate to buy all your Don P.
and bust a cap in any fucking honkey!

What do you think, man? I wish you could hear it!

Yo' brother in the hood...

B-Smooth

PROFANATOR NOTE: Monkey, do you know how dope I feel?

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: How dope brother? Say it baby, say it.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 24

Ben,

I think you are good singers, you singe with everything, sky will be your limit.

But tell you the fact, those boxes are right now in Spain, the Security company does not know the content and will not know. The keys are with me in Africa. So how can they send me the money from the boxes?

You should try to understand the kind of deal that we are into then you will appreciate what I mean.

I will send you the Certificate tomorrow, but for you to get the keys, please, send me the money, okay.

Regards,

Soki.

Yo, Soki...

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 24

Whatup, dawg? I don't think you understand. Before you get the green, we need the pix, yo. We know that the bling bling is in Spain, we understand. The idea for you to take money out of them dope ass boxes was just a suggestion, nigga, chill. We are glad to send you the 800 dead presidents, just send us the picture so we can know you are runnin' with tha homiez! We
are used to loyalty in the hood, playa.

We know about the deal, Soki. We know it is some serious shizzi. We got the 800, send us a picture and where to send the cash. C'mon, one picture for our album cover, for 800! How can you pass that up, G?

Word,

B-Smooth

P.S. I am so glad you liked our song. That shiz was for you. You are like, our brother, man.

PROFANATOR NOTE: This M/F is trying to get out of sending a picture...Talk some sense into his whack ass!And by the way, I am diggin' on the baby mama thick ass bitches...Word...I am drunk.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 25

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 25

Soki,

Whatup, playa?

That is some impressive looking shizzi!!! It looks like your end is tight, apart from the photo which I am guessing you will send today. As soon as we get it and the Western Union details, we will roll with the 800 down at the Crenshaw sto.

Get in touch, dawg.

B-Smooth

P.S. Me and Black Mic wanna make you a honorary member of the South Side Crips. Do you have any idea what your rap name should be? We are so happy that you dig our music, brother.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 25

Ben,

I am lucky, I have been able to find my way into Calabar in Eastern boarder town of Nigeria. This Country is too big and there are so many Nationalities here. I will simply mix-up myself with the others. It will be pretty difficult for Kabila and his men to find me here. I am safe my brothers.

I have the picture of myself and my wife taken the day of our wedding. I am scaning it right now but the saver of the cafe is somehow low. I will send the pics to you soon. As for the keys, I have made a perfect plans to have them sent to you via diplomatic courier. When I get the money today then first thing tomorrow I will proceed to the courier office and you will have
the Air way bill with you later in the day.

Send the money by western union through my friend who has been with me all the time. His name is Maxwell Obiekwu, the address is 23 Okon Avenue, Wayas Layout, Calabar, Nigeria. You will be required to choose text questions and Answers in the western union. Choose as you deemed fit and let me know both the questions and the answers as well as the control number. I and Maxwell will be in the bank together to pick up the money. He has the papers but I do not, so he will help.

Let me hear from you as soon as you have the photos with you.

Regards,

Soki.

PROFANATOR NOTE: This will not do!

Ebola Monkey Man: Is that a white lace glove he is wearing? What's up with that?

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Sept. 25

Ahhh Soki Soki,

What's up playa?. It's Michael Banks. Ben told me to check his email. Aparently he is having some baby momma dramma that he had to attend to. Anyway, I'm glad you are safe. I think you should come to Los Angeles. Anyway, we got the photo. It's all wrong dog. We can't use a wedding picture with you in a white lace glove for the photo that goes inside of the album cover. We need a photo of you holding a sign that says ""Foe-on Nine all over this muthafucka!" Straight Hip Hop playa, no R&B. It's a collage of pictures of all our friends from the streets. Why won't you do that? You want us to give you $800 and you won't send the photo. What's up with that? Just do it man so I can feel we have a trust. I got the paper work from Western Union today and filled out the information. For the question and password section, lets use:

Q - Who that is?

P - That's just my baby's daddy.

The lady says that you don't even need your ID as long as you know the password. I have the $800 and I am ready to go. Please send the right photo.

Peace out,

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: After I sent this, my man Soki fired off 6 emails to both my email and The Profanator's in a span of 12 hours. He's gripping big time. He wants that $800 so bad the wheels are falling off. SOKI, GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 25

Mike,

You are treating me like a small baby because I asked you to send money . I have told you that things are not easy with me. I live far from my home. I have no home now. I am shattered. The only hope of re-rehabilitation that is left to me now is the fund in Spain. I lived in Presidential Mansion with some command of Soldiers under me. Now I am running from one country to the other. My wife lives out their in Morocco.

My home was raised down with bullet and fire by Joseph Kabila and his co-cohorts. Now they are after my life but that is difficult. For your information, if you do not quite understand, my Father , the late Mobutu Seseseko, was the most powerfully ruler in the Land of Congo till date. I control Diamond filed. I had all that I ever needed. So do not think that I am asking for money for personal interest. If my reqirement for money is for immediate gains, then I would have gone to so many Heads of States in African and I will have all that I want.

My wife was able to keep that photo because women cherish their marital souvenir like albums etc more than men. I can't even think of any photo of mine anywhere. All my personal belongings were burnt down. So where do you want me to get the photo that will make you happy. My friends, I have done my best and I don't think that I will have to bother my head more than I have done so far for this issue.

I came into this country today and since the past 10hours, I have not had anything like food. I have been driving from one point of the City that I have just entered to the other. My friends, if you want to work with me, then let us work together with what is available. I hope that we will meet soon and then you take so many photos of me as you deemed fit.I trust you guys and you must rust me inturn. If there is no trust, then we beter stop dealing with each other because we must fail. Success is only achievable when there is full understanding between the parties involved in a transaction like this.

The western union woman was wrong, tell her that you are sending to Africa. There must be identification and with valid papers in here for you to get paid from western union . The only way, I can get that money in my name will be that you will have to give a standing instruction that I should be paid without Identification. Then the text question and answer will be acceptable.

I am here and open to advise.

Regards,

Soki Mobutu.

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 25

Mike,

Sorry guys, maybe I was too had with my email.

I can not do so manythings because of my personality. You need to understand. I have sent you the picture that is readily available now. You take photos of me when we meet in your country for now this is all I can do. I am sorry.

Regards,

Soki Mobutu.

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 25

Mike,

I have been through so many things in recent times. So my temperament has been afftected. If you would not mind, let me scan my international passport and send to you. This is can easily be done. If you insist on having my photo where I am holding on to something, then describe what you will want me to hold on to so that when that is sent to you. It will be accepted.

Regards,

Soki

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 26

Ben & Mike,

I have sent you another email asking that you describe the kind of photo that you require of me. I also said that I am sorry about my out burst. I have recently developed some kind of ugly and uncivilized character having been hiding my head in the bush for some years now.

Please, bear with me brothers, lets get on, you see, I have strongly believe in my instincts, I have told myself that this transaction will have to be between me and you. So there is no reason for disagreement. Just let me know exactly what you want.

Regards,

Soki.

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 26

Ben & Mike,

I have another a photo of myself and some friends taken when I was in the University studying for my Master's Degree in Cairo Egypt. I will send you that if you would not mind. Otherwise, I expect you to tell me what you want.

Soki.

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: Check out the picture of Soki ROCKIN' DA MIC!

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 26


Mike & Ben,

Those are the pictures that I took in Accra, Ghana during the Ecowas peace negotiation between my Soldiers and the Liberation Front Joseph Kabila three weeks ago.

The group photo was taken during my Master Graduation in University of Cairo , Egypt.

Regards,

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 26

Yo Soki:

Black Mic is gonna be writin' to you later, yo. But I wanted to jump the gun and say don't worry about actin like a little bitch, playa. We know that you are under pressure an all that jazz. Black Mic was all pissed and ready to bust caps and shit, but I told that nigga to chill. You know how he gets. Anyway, we understand that you just had an outburst, you are still short-bus special to these homiez!

Man, that is some fine baby mamma thick ass bitch action you got goin' on, dawg! Are all the ladies where you are as fine as that? Damn! And I love the picture of you rockin' the mic. I knew you were a brotha!

What we need from you is a picture of you holding a sign that says "Foe-on Nine all up in this muthafucka!" Our group is called Foe-on Nine and the album is gonna be called "All up in this Mothafucka!" We are gettin' all of our posse to take pictures of themselves for the cover. Send us this picture, dawg. It will be the ultimate sign of respect, word. We love you, man... we really want you to be a part of this

As soon as we get it, Black Mic will run down to the Western Union and send you the 800 malt liquor vouchers (money) via the details you sent us, yo.

We need this picture as soon as possible, dawg. We are supposed to be gettin' the album done by tomorrow!

Let us know,

Peace out,

B-Smooth

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 26

Ben,

I have snt you some picture already pleae, cheguw.

Internal.

PROFANATOR NOTE: Yo, this bad MF is getting gangsta with us, I think. What is cheguw? Internal!

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Sept. 26

What's up Soki,

My boy B-Smooth has calmed me down and shit. I felt like bustin caps and shit. It was like Black Mic on level 9 as opposed to the always dangerous level 6. I apologize for getting snippy with you. I just want that photo for the inside of the album cover. My music is my life and sometimes I'm straight Hip Hop. That's why I have B-Smooth, he's a little more R&B if you know what I mean. He's not afraid to kick it to the ladies. For real. Anyways man, I just wanted to say I'm glad you are our friend dawg. I wrote this rhyme for you:

At night a clutch my gun, and take another breath
Apologize to my nigga Soki, because he's the mother fuckin best
Just me and you smoking hella trees
bustin caps at all honkies, cuz they the real enemy
I've had a lot of fake ass homies, in my lifetime
but I swear to God dawg if Kabilla touch you, he gonnna see my nine
lets take a trip to through my mind if you will
Soki don't forget my steel, cuz we got whitey to kill
and if you trust me man then I'm gonna trust you too
and we gonna get that money like the playas do
I pour out a little liquor, cuz you ain't here
I yell out Soki where you at with my gang sign in the air
bustin caps at the police, you know how I do
crip walkin on they dead bodies cuz I'm down with the blue
PEACE!

I wrote that shit for you dawg. Basically came up with it in five minutes. Word. Send that picture and lets take care of business. Well, got to go, my baby's momma is paging. Drama and shit.

Talk to you soon,

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

PS - You wife is fine. Good job man. Your pimp hand is way strong.

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 27

Mike,

Have you not seen this photo?

If that does not comply to your wish, then I am confused. You should therefore tell me what you require.

Soki.

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: He resent the photos from his graduation.

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Sept. 27

Soki,

Try to understand this. The inside of our album cover is going to be all our friends and family holding signs that say "Foe-on Nine all up in this muthafucka!" This is going to show the world that we have support. We are going to name the album "Foe-on Nine all up in this muthafucka!" Now do you see why?

I don't understand playa. It doesn't seem like a difficult thing to do. It's a lot easier than coming up with $800. You do for me, I'll do for you. Word!

We are supposed to be boys. I love my dawgs. Like a fat kid love cake.

Peace

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

PS - Do you think I'm a good rapper? I'm thinking about releasing a solo album called "Don't Shoot Till You See the Whites." I haven't figured out how to tell B-Smooth. I've written a few songs in my spare time. After we release "Foe-on Nine all up in this muthafucka!", I think I will concentrate on my own songs. I wrote a song last night called "Ryan Seacrest is a Mothafuckinbeeotch!" It's got cross-over apeal and I think it would be perfect for the radio.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 27

Yo, Soki,

Now I'm gettin' all pissed and shit, dawg. I have seen those pictures but they will not do. I am starting to wonder whether we should even be fronting this $800.00. I told Black Mic to hold it until we got the picture we requested. So, if you want the bling bling, send us the picture, nigga!

Internal,

B-Smooth

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 27

B-Smooth

You need not get angry without understanding my position, If you send my photo into your album, you will be in great danger.

If you will send the money fine, otherwise, I will seek alternative ways to send you the keys, but surely, you will have to be in Spain soon. This is why I had wanted you to help make the issue of sending the keys easier.

Consider my explanations, okay.How was you friday night, was it cool.

Soki.

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Sept. 28

Mike,

I can not appear in the Album, I am a security risk, besides, we are wanted for war crimes, if I appear in your album, then there is trouble for you, okay. I will send you the keys at my own time., let me look for money elsewhere to send you the keys.

Meanwhile, the Firm in Spain will contact you, be prepared to go and take the cargoes within this week.

You must be a good Raper and composer too.

Regards,

Soki.

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: Raper? Black Mic - worlds greatest raper and composer. Doesn't go together for some reason.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 28

Soki,

I'm sorry, dawg, I was just gettin stressed because of the album. My friday night was dope, playa. There was biatches everywhere! Black Mic went out on the prowel while stayed in for a while and got my Jimmy waxed several damn times! I know you get my drift, nigga.

So, I have an idea, G. I ain't worried about no motha fucka bein' up in this mothafucka if you send this picture. Black Mic will gangsta style lay down the smack on their mothafuckin' re asses. Word. I ain't too shabby with a glock too. Anyway, I had an idea. If you can't take the picture, perhaps you can get one of your boys to do it. Shit, nigga, just call a motherfucka you
know to send us the damn picture holding a sign saying "Foe-on Nine all up in this mothafucka." It don't have to be you.

We will settle for a picture of your friend. Then we will end the $800 and proceed.

You are my friend, brotha. Not as tight as Black Mic, but then you know all about that bad ass biatch. He is like my brotha. We compliment each other so well, dawg. I just hope he never leaves the group. I wrote this rhyme for his ass. Tell me if you think he will like it. Shit, Nigga, tell me if you like it.

Peace out,

B-Smooth

One in the Chamber

-Trash Talk-

Yo DJ Sogay, I'm gonna need some funky shizzam to bust this motherfucker.

Kick it...

Ah shit, dawg... that is some funky ass shit! That shit makes me wanna Fuck and shit. Gaad, damn. This one goes out to my boy Michael Banks, A.K.A. Black Muthfuckin' Mic -Bitch Honkey Killa

-verse one-

While I'm lyin' on the couch with my muthafuckin chill on
Black Mic be on the streets with his mothafuckin thrill on
If I got thick ass baby mammas chillin at the crib
Mike B. be bustin' caps with the niggaz he be with
Bustin caps at honkey mothafuckas all fuckin day
Black Mic on the streets is like a bird o' damn pray
You know his favorite game is gattin in the derriere
Black Mic is more aggressive than a fuckin pitt bull terrier.

-Chorus-

Click clack clock goes one in the chamber (oh yeah)
This motherfucka be the bitch that is mothafuckin tamin' ya (word)
Damn Black Mike got a damn name inscibed (fo real, nigga)
on every bullet for every honkey in his mothafuckin' life

-trash talk-

You ever notice how the mothafuckas pumpin in the crowd be honkey ass
mothafucka's? No wonder Black Mic gets so severe on dey ass...

-Verse two-

He's the primo honkey killa with pockets full of hate
Bustin caps in whitey, I can fuckin' relate
when you see him go ape shit get prepared to duck
Mike be on a warpath and all honkeys are fucked.
And when the shootin' is done at the end of the day
and I'm chillin wid my nigga at the chick filet
we joke about bitches and cappin' honkeys too
sippin on forties and the po po never knew.

-Chorus-

Click clack clock goes one in the chamber (oh yeah)
This motherfucka be the bitch that is mothafuckin tamin' ya (word)
Damn Black Mike got a damn name inscibed (fo real, nigga)
on every bullet for every honkey in his mothafuckin' life

-trash talk-

See, that be my boy black mic, bitch honkey killa. You know I take my
bitches any day o' the week, but when the shizz goes down I got yo' back
brother. Like a motherfucker...

Sogay, take us out o' this mothafuckin' bitch. Word.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 28

Hi B-Smooth,

This is splendid, Nicks will be in the photo studio tomorrow, it takes at least 24hours to get a photo out. So on tuesday, you will have Nicks photo holding the sign "FOR- ON NINE"

That is a deal. You write songs almost everyday, how come you have such beautiful talent, you and Mike Banks will surely go places in this profession of yours. Nicks is my right hand man, he is like me, I trust him, so wait till tusday and the pics will be yours.

Regards,

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 29

Yo, Soke-Dog:

I am glad that yo boy Nicks is so damn splendid. Just wanted to remind you that the sign has to say "Foe-on Nine all up in this mothafucka!"

Word!

Anyway, dawg, I thought up a name for you as a gangsta. Now when you are walkin down the street and a muthafucka like Joseph Kabila fronts on your shit, you can feel pride when you yank the nine.

From now on your name is Soke-Dog. We love you bro and want you to a member of the South Side Crips.

Just to share between me and you, I have been writing a little R&B on the side. Don't worry, playa, I am all gangsta and shit, but every so often I wanna be like this gigantic mothafuckin world renowned lover and shit. Black Mic don't understand how I could wanna be lovin on bitches while he is out bustin heads. What do you think of this new song I wrote about you and I, dawg?

It seems like every mothafucka on the street
got no time for love and respect
they only interested in makin a nigga eat concrete,
and all the brotha's chillin' up in the hood
constantly talkin' bout the niggaz they been dustin'
fat ass caps they been bustin' when they shoulda been lustin'
for some fine ass honkey bitch
This whole situation is losin' the word o' B-Smooth
losin' my respect, as they losin' dey lives
lost bitches to the whine of Black Mic's mothafuckin' nine.
And all the while the homiez on the corner
drinkin' Mickeys suckin' hickies on their bitchies,
it's like they don't even fuckin' wanna know
about shit in the world not just chillin' in the front of the sto.

So now, check my new nigga Soki,
This bitch got some hokey in his mothafuckin pokey, yo
He ain't afraid to dog a homie like a little honkey bitch
but at the same time bustin' rhymes, makin love,
makin' the niggaz' bitches twitch.
Cause Soke-Dog and B-smooth are in the house
We'll get this trunk full a bling and we'll be blinging
till we're mothafuckin' rich.


-Chorus-

Bitches everywhere be shootin' each other to hell all day
While Soke and B-smooth cruise the hood in their new blingin chevrolet
While these gangstaz be usin' nines tryin' to set the rules
We be using trunks o' money as fuckin' foot stools.

Who's the new nigga in the hizzy?
Soke-dog be the one, mothafucka...


Peace out!

B-Smooth

P.S. It's time for you to be a playa, playa! Sign your shit Soke-Dog!

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 30

Dear Benjamin,

View the attached copies.

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 30

Gad, Damn, Nigga!

Nicks is one funky lookin mothafucka and all, but could a brother look any less interested? He is wearing the pimp ass threads, but he looks pained, yo.

Also, Soki, the sign is meant to say "Foe-on Nine all up in this mothafucka!" Can you relate? I am gonna have to speak to my homie, Black Mic about this. I have $800.00 dollars in my hand, yo. Retake the picture as we asked. And get your boy Nicks to look interested. Shit.

Also, I wrote you a song, dawg. You didn't even tell me if you liked it.

Intenal,

B-Smooth

PROFANATOR NOTE: Where the fuck can I get a suit like that Monkey? Tell me where, please?

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: I have no idea but I want one too.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 30

Bi Smooth,

That was not what you said earlier , what we wrote on the photo was what you demanded. Anyway, another photo will be sent tomorrow, but let us know the mode of dressing, will you prefer a T-shirt.

Please, reply now.

I will have much more interest in song when i have heard it on radio.

Regards,

Soki.

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: He called you "Bi" dude, that's not gangsta.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Sept. 30

Soke-Dog...

That is exactly what I said, yo. Tell you what homie, listen really hard. Try to understand this.

The sign is to say everything that appears on the next line:

"Foe-on Nine All Up in This mothafucka"

That is what it is to say, dawg!

I got an idea, perhaps Nicks can wear some real african dress. You know, like robes and shit. And some kinda hat.

Waitafuckin'momenthomie!

I got's an even better idea! Get a white t-shirt and paint the sign on it! Make it so the t-shirt is the sign! Get a white t-shirt and paint on it the following line:

"Foe-on Nine All Up in This Mothafucka"

Then have Nicks wear it and take a picture of him looking cool! Dawg, if you pull this off I am gonna tell Black Mic to send you $1,000!

Be patient, yo! Our music will be on the radio, playa!

Internal peace,

B-Smooth

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 30

Bi Smooth,

I will make another photo, but it will staty utill thursday.

Soki

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: He called you "Bi" again.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Sept. 30

B Smooth,

If there is a T-shirt we will do as you say otherwise Nicks will wear African Atire.

You will have the picture ready next tomorrow.

Regards,

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 1

Yo, Koke-Dog,

Whattup, yo?

Will we be gettin the picture of Nicks today? I gotta get the album cover art to the store. We are so excited, I went ahead and told Black Mic to send you a grand (One Thousand U.S. Dollars, yo) as soon as we get the picture.

What's up with the keys, playa?

Word Internal,

B-Smooth - A.K.A. Gangsta poet and supreme bitch lover

P.S. Black Mic goes by the tag line "Bitch Honkey Killa." What do you think of my new tag line "Gangsta Poet and Supreme bitch lover," yo? I respect your opinion, and I would love to know what a nigga gots to say. Word.

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Oct. 1

Soki,

What's up playa? I heard you are going to re-shoot the photo for our album. Thank you. I look forward to seeing it. I talked to B-Smooth and he said everything is on schedule. Speaking of B-Smooth, his birthday is coming up and I wanted to do something gangsta for him. I was in the recording studio yesterday with the R&B group Three Times One Minus One. You've probably heard of them. They sang the songs "The Greatest Love in History" and "Girl, Let Me Suck Ya Big Toe." Anyway, we made a song for B-Smooth as a surprise. Check it out and let me know what you think as your opinion is greatly appreciated in this mutha:

[Black Mic talking intro]
Yo Yo Yo
Black Mic up in the house and I'm here to talk about B-Smooth - Gangsta poet
and supreme bitch lover. When you go to work, B-Smooth sleeps with your wife. When your wife says
"B-Smooth, don't leave!" He says "Bitch, go make me a sandwich."

[Black Mic rap verse 1]
I got this homie, his name is smooth,
B to be exact, and he's my motha fuckin dude
Spittin game to the ladies, you know he's a mack
Pimp, playa, hustla as a matter a fact
It's in his walk, he walks with a limp
Straight gangsta, OG 4 life cuz he's a pimp

[2 Gun Shots] & [sound of women screaming]

{Chorus by Three Times One Minus One}
To my people in the hood all across the land
B-Smooth gonna give it to ya
To the independent hoochies with 8 kids and no man
B-Smooth gonna give it to ya
If you break him off something proper, he'll buy ya babys some diapers
B-Smooth gonna give it to ya
And if you windshield is foggy, he'll buy you new wipers

[Black Mic rap verse 2]
It's more like the South Crips glide
They way we wear our hats to the side
The way we shoot at honkies from the ride
The way we do when we the crew and the whities hide
From my boy B-Smooth, to the girls by his pool
Like Jules Winfield in the coffee shop saying "Bitch Be Cool"

{repeat chorus by Three Times One Minus One}

[Black Mic talking outro]
Yeah, that's B-Smooth in a nutshell! Busting caps in yo ass in 2004.
Killing mutha fuckas and kicking two doller hoes with three doller haircuts
in the vagina. Going all internal in this BEEEEYOTCH!

Peace.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 1

Michael ,

I am sending the photo again but it has to be before the week end, my boy travled to South Africa and will be back on friday.

Happy Birth day to B-Smooth.

You song must be okay for you to sing with R $B.

Regards,

Soki.

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: I wish my fans could see the smile on my face. No matter what we say to this guy, he hangs in there. Bravo Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 2

Soke-Dog,

Yo, that mothafucka mike is gonna get my boot in his ass, yo. That nigga knows I get all shy on my birthday, dawg. Thanks anyway, playa.

Yo, tell your boy Nicks to get off his ass and get us our shizzy, yo. Damn, We got cash for the western union, Soki. Just get us the pic we wanted and its pay day brother, for real!

Hop to it, nigga!

Internal,

B-Smooth

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 2

B Smooth,

Nicks will be back on monday and tuesday next week you will have the pics.

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 6

It's Monday, bro.

Where are the pics?

Hope you are cold chillin', dawg.

B-Smooth

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 6

B Smooth,

You know that you will have to be in Spain later this week, or early next week when you have the keys. So get ready brother.

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 6

Soke-Dog,

Wednesday! You said today? What the fuck is up, dawg? I been chillin all weekend thinking I would have the picture of nicks in the t-shirt with the words on it now you say wednesday? Nigga, please.

Damn, Black Mic is holding onto $1000 for yo ass, honk-dog... It is like you don't want it. I ain't travelling to spain till I get the keys and the photograph. You don't get the money till we get the photogarph, dawg.

Shit.

B-Smooth

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 6

Hei Man,

You have to give me some kind of respect, okay. We are partners in business and no one can stamped each other into anything. I am no kid to $1,000.00 you know, the picture will be sent to you even tomorrow, but not today because Nicks took too much time in Kinshasha. He is coming into the town in the next few hours and by then it will be late, so the earliest we will have the photos will be tomorrow or next.

I will see what can be done to make it fast but you have to learn to respect me the way I do to you too. Respect is resiprocal you know. Peace be onto you. how is your friend Mike Banks, say hello to him too.

Regards,

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 6

Soke-Dog,

I am sorry, brother. I have just been all stressed out because we are holding the album for the photo of Nicks. Our music studio has heard of the photo and they think it is a great idea, yo, and they want us to wait. It is just gettin me on edge. I do respect you, my main man. Like, internal, yo.

Awww, dawg, I forgot to tell you the shizzam: Black Mic was arrested this weekend for beating a mothafucka at the Krispy Kreme. I wasn't there, but apparently this honkey came up to Mic and spoke shit about the South Side Crips and Foe-on Nine. Luckily, Mic didn't but a cap in his ass, but nigga beat the fool with a dougnut mixing spoon. It is Ok, he will be released on
bond tomorrow. I think it is all kinda funny.

Anyway, homie, Mic sent me a song for my birthday.... that brother is the best.

Respect, yo.

B-Smooth

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: I almost pissed myself when I read that. Mixing Spoon is my new weapon of choice!

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 6

B Smooth,

You are my man, please, say me well to Mike.

Tomorrow, you will have the pics.

Regards,

Soki.

PROFANATOR NOTE: I am his man. Awesome.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 7

Soke-Dog,

Yo, B-Smooth is all up in this mothafucka, yo. How are you homie? I got a few things to tell you, dawg.

As we are business partners and all, it is only right that we cut through the shizzi and talk about the arrangements for the transaction. Firstly, we are looking into travel arrangements for Spain, yo. We need the keys. Straight up business partners like us do things right. I just want you to know that we respect you just like you respect us! We ain't just sending $1000 dead presidents just like that. We know you take that seriously, but would you send somebody you never met $1000? When we get the new photo of Nicks, it will make us understands the depth of your words, yo. Then we will send you the grand to get the keys which you will then send to us.

I can't wait to get the picture, dawg. It is going to be great on our album cover. Hey, when we have got the bling bling from Spain, you should come on tour with us! There are fine bitches everywhere and enough malt liquor to drown a motherfucka and shit, word! Would you like to come on tour with us?

Man, Black Mic is all depressed and shit. Krispy Kreme decided to press charges so nigga gots to go back to court, yo! I have been tryin to cheer him up. Please write to him and tell him 'whatup.' I think when he gets the picture of Nicks he will cheer up considerably. He wanted to go and spend the cash on a new gat to bust ass with, but I told him no way. That money is for our mothafucka, Soki. I now have the money, please send the picture.

Last night Mike and I wrote a song all about how we are hard mothafuckas and how Krispy kreme is whack. Tell us what you think, yo.

Fuck Krispy Kreme for Pressin Charges

(B-Smooth rant/talking intro)

Yo, Black Mic, a lot of mothafuckas been asking what we are all about since
that shit went down at the Krispy Kreme, yo. I thought we could rhyme back
and forth and let them know about the world's hardest motha fuckas on the
street. Damn, the way these honkies been talking, youd'a thought we were
from fuckin' Ohio and shit.

Let me spit some motherfucking exposition, yo.


(Verse One, B-Smooth)

Yo playa, yo ganagsta, yo mothafuckin fool!
Foe-on Nine making all the little bitches drool
with the dopest o niggaz Black Mic and B-Smooth
rocking the mic, yo, your senses'll blow a fuse
We're bad ass wid gats, badder still with bitches
Black Mic is the baddest when his trigger finger itches
That's why us playas are reaching out for eternity
fuck a drive by, we'll just camp a fraternity
ain't nothing that makes us more furious to hurt
than little punk ass wiggas wearin snoop-dog t-shirts
If you think that's scary, then just remember this
I ain't all that bad, but Black Mic is the bizz---
nizz with a mother fuckin firing line
I could bust the dopest rhyme
and he could keep perfect time
bustin slugs from his colt nickle-plated nine.
I ain't a bitch when it comes to keeping my shit cocked
though my preference is a point 357 glock.
My nigga will go with any gat he got, yo
but he be sleepin' with his colt under his pillow
on a nightly basis, while most niggaz be in stasis
while I'm bonin' some bitch at one of our places.
Ain't no fuckers that should mess with us
you'll die if you fuckin' put the test to us
Earth to earth, and fucking dust to dust
make sure your gat's not all bound up with rust
cause we are on the warpath and we're gonna get some
and this ain't star-trek homie, our shit ain't set to stun.
So at the end of the day what does this dope shit mean?
we are comin to your town and we wantin our dicks sucked clean
by your finest dopest bitches and your whack ass hoe's too
and while your fuckin at it we'll fuck your mammas too.
One thing's fo sure we get what we're coming for
no that aint a fucking metaphor
its a fucking deal twenty-four
and seven, this ain't heaven, this is hell
And while we at it, you got any motherfuckin' reefer to sell?

(Trash Talk - B-Smooth)

That's how it is every day mothafuckas! Fuck all o' y'all! Black-Mic, apply
this shizzy to the K to the K to the mothafuckin doughnut, yo!

(Rant - Black Mic)

Let me set it off. Uh. Uh. Uh.


(Verse Two)

I said fuck Krispy Kreme, for pressin charges
and fuck the county jail for the four day hardship
Play a nigga like I'm a fool from Ohio
shit, Black Mic's a bitch honkey killa, check my bio
And stop fucking with me like I'm a teenager
with a fondness for donuts and a pager
two way text, mobile satelite cell phone
kripy kreme can leave a message at the beep cuz Mic ain't home
from here on out, the only donuts will be Dunkin
cuz the kk is one k away from fuckin
racist, cuz I beat motha fuckas with a mixing spoon in they faces
cuz they mess with Black Mic in the places
where I like to get donuts and get wasted
they just lucky that B-Smooth wasn't there to blast with the nine
cuz he ain't that kind, to take a mother fucka out with a spoon on a dime
So fuck krispy kreme, the county, they mama, and that fool
But not my lawyer for paying bail cuz that dude's cool

(Black-Mic Trash Talk)

Yeah, cuz it's like that. Wanna say what's up to my boy B-Smooth. We taking over. Everybody start going to Dunkin Donuts yall for you donut needs. Fuck Krispy Kreme for pressing charges. We out!

(B-Smooth Outro)

Word, brother! That shit was dope. All you mothafuckas out there, did you notice that shit was so fat we didn't even need a mothafuckin chorus? Straight gangsta style... Internal! Out

We have big hopes for this one, Soki!

We love ya, playa!

Internal,

B-Smooth (Gangsta Poet and Supreme Bithch Lover)

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 7

Benjamin.

View.

Soki.

PROFANATOR NOTE: Yo...... Internal!

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: OMG - He actually used the t-shirt as the sign. We are witnessing a miracle.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 8

Yo, Soki,

Whatup, playa? Shit, dawg, that is the dopest, phattest picture we have ever seen! Thank you so much! We are fixing the album cover and I will send you a copy when it is all done! Man, Nicks is one funky looking mothafucka! And that t-shirt is dope, yo!

I am going to give Black Mic the $1000 to take to the Western Union, today. Do me a favour, playa, gimme the details of who to send it to one more time.

Last night, Foe-on Nine played a show at the Nut Busta's Crib. That is a club downtown, yo. Anyway, about halfway through the set, the crowd peaked and started to go wild cause Black Mic took out a dougnut mixing spoon, set in on fire, then pissed on it, on stage! He did this as an intro to our new song "Fuck Krispy Kreme for Pressin Charges." Then later on as I intro'd the
song "Beeeeeeotch spelled backwards don't spell shit, nigga," I told all the blingin bitches to take their titties out for B-Smooth -- world renowned gangsta lover! Dude the crowd was so dope and was filled with bitches and titties. Every time we saw a honky in the crowd, Black Mic and I would tell all o the niggaz in the place to beat them a mothafuckin honkey, fo real.

So, Soke-dog, I will get Mike's ass to the WU today. Send me the info. Can't wait for you to see the album cover, yo.

Internal,

B-Smooth

PROFANATOR NOTE: God Bless this pugnacious dolt.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 8

B Smooth,

You guy must be very good player of music, I hope to watch you act one day and very soon. The names you will send the money is:-

MAXWELL OBIEKWU
10 OBUDU RANCH WAY
OBUDU RANCH
CALABAR.
NIGERIA.

Please, make no mistakes with the spelling of the name , you would have to choose text questions and answer, then after sending the money, you will send me the control number and the text question and answer too.

Tell Mike that I heard about his brush with the law and that God will guide the two of you. Let us hope to meet in Spain next week, okay.

I will come back to the cafe to see if you have sent the money,

Regards,

Soki.

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: He sent this email and a couple of different versions like 8 times in 12 hours.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 8

Hello Mike,

I have not heard from you for some time now although B Smooth told me that you had some bad times with some sort of persons and that resulted in police affairs. How are you now?

I have sent the Pics of Nicks with the T-Shirt, it was sent yesterday. Your friend told that today the money will be sent, this means that you will receive the keys in four days from tomorrow. It takes 4days for courier to move from Africa to USA. Then you guys will be getting ready for Spain in the later part of next week. The journey will take less than threedays.

I hope to hear from you soon.

Regards,

Soki

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Oct. 8

Sok-Dawg,

What up gangsta? I just got back from EMM Records (me and B-Smooth's record company). Dude, they loved the picture so much that they added you to the cover of the motha fuckin album dawg. It is straight hip-hop. I'm so fuckin excited I could bust a cap in a white boy. Word! Please tell me what you think of the cover. I also included in this email the track list (the back of the album cover). My only beef wit da album is they left off the song "What's Up With The Rainbow Rag Dawg?

Oh yeah, now we can get you yo money playa. Tell me what you think about the album and sit tight. Look forward to kicking it in Spain with you. YO MATE DOS NINOS BLANCOS PORQUE ESTABA ABURIDO DAWG. I think that means hello in Mexican or some shit like that. Ima go ask one of the essays. I'm sorry if this email is all fucked up but I'm drunk and HIGH as a motha fucka.

Internal brother!

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"



EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: Hey, I tried. Aren't the Profanator and I handsome as gangstas? That afro wig was the best 7.99 I've ever spent.

PROFANATOR NOTE: We are the whitest white people I have ever seen. It makes it so fucking funny. I bet between the pair of us there is no soul and neither of us can hold a rhythm for more then one second.

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Oct. 9

Hello Black Mik,

You and B Smooth must be very fast thinkers all the way, I love the impression you have made on album, it is a good art work.

Please, get the album to me on your way to Spain. By now you would have sent the money so that the keys will be on the way to you. We need not delay too much you know. When exactly do I expect the money so that the guys that are arranging the diplomatic courier of keys will be notified as well.

Regards,

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 9

Soke-Dawg!

Isn't the album cover the best!!! Our record company was happy as a little white bitch with Kobe Bryant! What do you think of me and my nigga, Black Mic? I wouldn't mess with us, yo.

We have been playing shows every night, dawg. We are working it. Last night we played the Pubic Mound. That is a club downtown filled with bitches. At one point in the show, this honky gets on stage to hang with Black Mic and myself. It was right before the song: Fuck Krispy Kreme for Pressing Charges. The spoon has become part of our act, yo. Black Mic beat the honkey on the stage with the spoon! The crowd went insane yo! I didn't even have to ask for titties and they were flappin everywhere like a mothafucker, dawg! This shit is taking off! The crowd was chanting your name, yo! We are gonna
be famous! With any luck this is gonna make us millionaires!

I got some bad news, but please listen and understand. I will have it fixed by tomorrow. There is this fine honkey bitch named Candy. Black Mic has been trying to get with her for ages. She is a fine baby mama thick ass beyotch, dawg. Well, Black Mic asks me how he can hook up with her seeing as I am all into love and shit. Well I told the nigga he gotta get some bling bling,
some Krystal, and some motha fucking Hennessy. Well I had given him the 1000 to take to the Western Union and the dumbass went to the sto, bought up all the liquor, and got him a 24k rope for his neck---with your 1000. All to get a thick ass bitch.

We are getting payed tomorrow for our show tonight. I will have the 1000 back by tomorrow and I will take it to the Western Union myself. It is my fault. Black Mic knows all about kicking ass, but he is a bit re with the finances, yo.

For your information, the password will be: Foe on Nine

The secret question will be: What does Beeeeeyotch spelled backwards spell?

The answer will be: Yo Mamma

I am sorry about the delay, yo. I will get the money to you so we can get the keys...

Internal,

B-Smooth

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 9

B Smooth,

It is okay, the only thing is that we are wasting time, you are supposed to be in Spain next week, but you need the keys to get there. Let us thereofore expect that you will make it today by sending the money.

The question you chose is rather to long, western union will not accept that long question, make it shorter.

Have a nice time and say me well to Black Mike.

Regards,

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 9

Soke-Dawg:

I am going to go and get the bling bling from our show last night. I will be at the Western Union at around 5 PM Today to wire you the grand, nigga. I am also going to the airport to get tickets for Spain... Black Mic speaks a little Spanish from chillin with the essays, yo! He tought me this: MANOS ARRIBA MOTHAFUCKA! It means: "whattup yo!"

OK, here is the new question: Who B-Smooth be bein' smooth with, yo?

Answer is the same: Yo mamma.

Last night Mic and I went all internal at this hip hop show. We had a life size picture of you made, dawg! Bitches were going wild, kissing all over them and shit. You are like, one sexy mothafucka to American honkey bitches, yo. We are also going to make Soke-Dawg T-shirts! Our fans will wear your picture! Isn't that the shizzam, playa? You should feel proud.

Yo, write me back soon and let me know if that question is good, yo.

Internal, Cheguw,

B-Smooth

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 10

B Smooth,

Thank you for those nice words about me. That is alright, but the question is too long, western union take only four short words for question, you may try something like -"what is my name" and answer will be "B Smooth".

When you make the T Shirts, please, remmber to keep some for me. I will need to hear your music too.

Let me know when you have sent the money so that I will make sure that the Diplomatic guys are alerted.

Regards,

Soki.

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Oct. 10

Mike,

Your friend B Smooth said that the fund will be sent today . I am writing to inform you that as soon as the keys are sent to you, then you both or one of you depending on what you want, will have to be in Spain sometime next week.

Regards,

Soki.

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Oct. 10

Sok-Dawg,

Big bow wow baby. How are you? I'm finally sobering up after 3 straight days of drinking and smoking. This album cover thing got me all geeked. I've done some crazy shit the last couple of days. Let me lay it out for you as you will get a good laugh from it:

1. Used the money I was supposed to Western Union you to buy liquor, condoms, and a fat gold chain. On a side note, I can't be trusted with money. I'm not into accountability plus like Jay-Z & JD said "Money Ain't a Thang." I leave that up to B-Smooth. I hope you forgive me but the way I look at it, you and B-Smooth fucked up. You trusted me. I once spent B-Smooth's rent money on something called the World's Most Expensive Afro Pick. It pissed him off so bad I thought he was going to blast.

2. Insulted my babies momma and her momma's momma so bad that the whole family took out a restraining order on my ass. I'm sure you can relate.

3. Took GHB and lost about 4 hours on Wednesday night. Woke up on some railroad tracks without my shirt, right shoe, and left sock. I have no idea where they are or who took them. Shit, who knows, maybe I threw them at some old people or something. Here's the real kicker, half of my Afro was shaved off. Completely gone! I had to go to Oh Harriet's to have the shave the other side off to even it out. I had great hair and now it's gone. Oh well, it will grow back. Right?

4. Was so drunk and high that I went into a Blood (rival gang) neighborhood and stole their mascot, Tallywinks (a killer Shitzu). I actually took pictures of us together to taunt the Bloods. Kind of like "Awww shit nigga, I done got yo Shit-Zu!" I've attached a couple of photos of me and Tallywinks. Little bitch Shitzu is vicious as a motha fucka. She be all biting my finger and shit. See, most Bloods have Pitbulls or Shitzus because they have lock jaw and will kill a mother fucker where he stands. Now Crips like myself, I prefer Rotts or Yorkies. Them dawgs are straight psycho. They'll not only kill a mother fucker where he stands but they will also go after anyone who witnessed the shit. Especially the Yorkie AKA King of the Concrete Jungle. Anyway, I got to return Tallywinks today but I'm not sure how to do it without getting shot. I'm sure the Bloods are going to be very pissed. Especially when they see the photos I took of me and Tallywinks chilling and shit. Hell, they might even shoot Tallywinks just for hanging out.

B-Smooth is going to get yo money to you today. Don't be a stranger. Hey, when we get to Spain, prostitutes on me. What do you say?

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: I'm trying as hard as I can to blow our cover but we are dealing with a card carrying retard.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 10

Yo Soke...

I got an idea, yo! Put all of the words in the question together and you only have 1 word!!!!

Check this out: WhoB-Smoothbebein'smoothwith,yo?

That is the question...

You tell me the answer, dawg!

B-Smooth

P.S. What size T-Shirt do you wear?

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 10

B Smooth,

That is alright, then the answer would be :- "Benjamin & Soki". Or you can choose an answer for yourself and let me know both the questions and aswers that were accepted by western union. The acceptable question and answer after the transfer will be what we need. Please, make sure that the names are spelt correctly.

My size is "LARGE"

Regards,

Soki.

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: He's large yo!

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 10

Whatup, yo?

Can you send me the western union details again? I deleted those mothafuckers by accident instead of hittin' print. I think the answer should be: yo mamma, or: yo mamma's mamma. What do you think, dawg?

Between you and me, Black Mic has been pissing me off, yo. He keeps getting all wasted and shit. Nigga came home with a little fuckin' kick dog and all. He brought it to my crib and the little bastard shit on the hardwood flo! And with money? Nigga please. We are still homiez and all, but I think I need a break to develop my R&B side, yo... Check this out, I am send you a
picture of me with MC Hawking. That mothafucka is hard as shit and dope, yo. Nobody fucks with the Hawkman. Anyway, I was in my R&B dress about to perform a show for some bitches with the Hawkman himself.

Tell me what you think, yo.

Internal,

B-Smooth

PROFANATOR NOTE: Dude, this is getting silly. We got to think of a way to wind Soke down. Anyone have any ideas for ridiculing Soki one more time? Black Mic, what do you think?

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: We need to loose ourselves in the music!

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 10

Hi B-Smooth,

The info once again is:- Maxwell Obiekwu.
10 Obudu Ranch Rd
Obudu Ranch
Calabar
Nigeria.

The photo is ok, who were those, are you the ones, you and your friend Mike.

I am still waiting.

Regards,

Soki.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 13

B Smooth,

Was there anything wrong?

Soki.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 13

Soke Dawg!

Whattup, yo? I am sorry brother, but we were on the road doing a mini tour this weekend. Playin shows is tiring and busy, yo. I am sorry I ain't had time to let you know about the money, but we have been way busy.

On Friday I took my ass to the Western Union. I have to tell you something: Who is this Maxwell Obiekwu mothafucka? I took the grand to the Western Union and tried to send it to him, but they said that on their computer records, his name and address had been blocked by the fucking secret service? That is all the lady at the counter said, playa. She said it was some new effort to block crime? Perhaps this Maxwell dude is trying to rip you off. Who is he? Anyway, I sent the money, yo. I used the same address as Maxwell, but I put the name as Prince Soki Mobutu. The Question was: WhoB-SmoothBBeingsmoothwith,yo? The answer is: Yo Mamma. Let me know when you get the money.

Black Mic and I have been writing songs all up in this MF. I got's to tell ya, we got some niggas that see us becoming successful and are trying anything to steal our money, yo. We wrote this song for them. Why can't everybody be honest like us and you?

CASHROLL!

(trash talk)

Yo, Black Mic, we are up in this motherfucker representing the south side crips, what yo got to say dawg?

I say we lay the shit down right and let these fake ass scammers know what's really going on!

Shall we tell em about whitey an how they are always trying to take our motherfuckin bling?

FUCK YEAH!

I say fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck dishonesty
frontal labotomies
for all fraudulant anomililies
boyz in lagos and their fucked dichotomies
livin' life large and large like gangsta business playas
but getting their money from deceitful affairs
not straight up bloods like our homie Soki (word)
but ripping yo bling like a thief on the low-key
And Black Mic don't stand fo that shit yo,
And B-Smooth bash you down then pick you up, ho
like a motha fuckin yo-yo, bustin heads like the po-po
just cause yo ass is po, don't you use me to wipe the flo
get yo ass out and get an honest job, nigga
then we'll talk again when yo cashroll is bigga
Oops mothafucka, I forgot to mention
about this crate of money sitting in detention
The Monkey and the Profanator make money with time
at desks, with jobs, and not the four one nine. (FOE-ON NINE, RETARD!)

BY NEXT TOMORROW I'LL BE KICKIN YO EXPENSE SETTIN ASIDE ASS! Yo Mike, buzz me on the hand phone if you want this shit to be resectful, yo!

(Chorus)
Talkin bout your cashroll (What?)
your shit ain't too tight (C'mon playa)
you chose some damn dishonesty (fuck you)
Shit ain't alright
Fuck the bass, how low can you go
(How low can you go) x5

I'm sitting outside this Internet Cafe here
I've got my gas can and light right here
bout to light this up right right here
I'm barbecuing up some scammers right here
I bring the pain, B-Smooth bring the marshmellows
take my money, you ain't a smart fellow
now how you gonna bring a blow dart to a gun fight
.45 on ya ass blind your eyes like the sunlight
lazy ass motherfucka, chicken head bustas
something smells fishy here, please provide me with your bank account numbas
so I can take back what's not rightfully yours
and spend it on the bitches, the tricks, the hos, the whores
steal my money and it's MURDA
I leave you saying stupid shit like "you are nothing but poor american that
feeds only burger"
I don't know what you heard about me
but a scammer can't get a dolla out of me
ya hold a sign that leaves us laughing
cuz I'm the motha fuckin Ebola Mon-KEY

This is Black Mic saying it's time to go External on they asses. Fake ass, bugga eating bitches. Time to complete the transaction. COMPLIMENTS OF THE SEASON BEEEEEEYOOOOOTCH!

(Chorus)
Talkin bout your cashroll (What?)
your shit ain't too tight (C'mon playa)
you chose some damn dishonesty (fuck you)
Shit ain't alright
Fuck the bass, how low can you go
(How low can you go) x5

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 13

Whattup, yo?

Did the Western Union Cooperate?

Let me know, playa!

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 14

B Smooth,

Did you send the money? Where is the control number? Send me the datas of the transfer like question and answers and the control number.

Soki.

Profanator Note: He replied. It is official peeps--Soki has shit for brains.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 14

Soki,

Dude, you ain't too bright, yo! I SENT THE MONEY!!!! I TOLD YOU THE QUESTION
AND ANSWER DUMB ASS!!

Once again:

Question: WhoB-SmoothBBeingSmoothWith,Yo?

Answer: Yo mamma!

I sent it to Prince Soki Mobutu with the information you gave me. I could not send it to Maxwell Orgazimo, or whatever his fuckin name was and shit. They did not let me! Do you even read the mails I send you? Get yo honkey ass down to the Western Union and get your money so we can get the keys. Shit, playa, there is a grand for you there! It was like, the maximum we
could send and shit.

Black Mic has the control number in his pocket. E-mail him for that.

Peace out, External!

B-Smooth

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 14

B Smooth,

Your email was full of very raw language, I think we should be mindfull of what we send to each other. I do not deserve such nature of email from you.

If you sent the money let have the control number, I can not pick up money myself because I am not carrying a passport of this country, change the transaction to Maxwell Obiekwu if you are serious about it.

Soki.

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Oct. 14

Mike,

B Smooth said that the western union control number is with you, please, let me have it, then change the name to Maxwell Obiekwu.

Soki.

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Oct. 14

Soki,

What's up playa? I've just been kicking it. Rocking the mic. You know how I do. Anyway dude, that Maxwell Obiekwu is on some sort of list that prevents us from sending money through Western Union to his ass. So we did you one better, we wired it directly to you. Prince Soki Mobutu! In the hezzzzi. Go get yo money dawg and get us those keys. What are you gonna do with your money? I know what I'm a do with mine. I'ma get me a Cadilac Escalade with the chromed out nose with the navigation arrow headed straight to your spot, Hyper white lights, ultra violet lens Suma tuma tires and they gotta be run flat T.V. where the horn go, boy can you top that ? Yeah!

Oh yeah. About that control number thingy. That shit was with me but you ain't going to believe what happened to that shit. Remember Tallywinks? That crazy ass little motherfuckin Shitzu? The mascot for the Bloods? You know. Well apparently that little bastard is Blood to the day he dies. Little dog chewed up my pants and shit and ate the paper that had the control number in it. Then, while looking me in the eye, little mother fucker pissed all over it. I felt like it was saying "Crip bitch, I'ma Blood till I die. Straight up!" I almost busted out the chrome plated gat and went rat ta tat tat on dat ass but I know that will cause a huge gang war. There are rules to gang wars. The first one is "YOU DON'T KILL ANOTHER GANGS MASCOT." I live by the code, I die by the code.

Anyways, sorry and shit. If you go down to Western Union, just tell them your name and the password. B-Smooth set it up. You know what I'm saying? If he done set up wreck shop while chilling with Soke Dawg foshezie and the posse. Now that shit don't even make no sense. That's how gangsta it is.

Peace

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 14

Soki:

That is right, we should be mindful of the mail we send to each other. Me sending raw language is like lying or something, homie. I know you and I are better than that. I am very very sorry.

However, WESTERN UNION WILL NOT LET ME SEND THE MONEY TO MAXWELL, SOKI!!!

OF COURSE I AM SERIOUS!!!! WHAT DO I DO???

Shit,

B-Smooth

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 14

B Smooth,

I have called western union here and there is no money on that name, please, try moneygram if you can not send to Maxwell Obiekwu but I don't know why.

Money gram will. As for me, I an not a citizen so I can't take money.

Regards,

Soki.

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: This is our effort to get him to go to the airport before we smack him. Due to the fact that he is retarded, we will probably have to tell him 10 times that we were just fucking with him.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki, Oct. 14

Fuck it,

We are gonna fly to Nigeria and deliver this money personally, nigga.

Between you and Black Mic, you couldn't find your asses with your hands in your back pockets.

I want Nicks to pick us up wearing that T-shirt, yo.

Here is the flight information. Your ass better be in Nigeria wher your address is. This shit is expensive! We are leaving this afternoon. I am going to take care of business B-Smooth Style. If Nicks does not meet us wearing that t-shirt, the deal is off and we are gonna spend the money on african thick ass baby mamma bitches, yo.

We leave this afternoon and get there tomorrow with cash in hand. I have cancelled the Western Union:

KLM--ROYAL DUTCH AIRLINES

Depart 4:10 pm Tue., Oct. 14, 2003 Los Angeles, CA(LAX)
KLM
Arrive 11:40 am Wed., Oct. 15, 2003 Amsterdam (AMS)
Flt. Info Flight 602 17 hrs 45 min


Depart 12:30 pm Wed., Oct. 15, 2003 Amsterdam(AMS)
KLM
Arrive 5:55 pm Wed., Oct. 15, 2003 Lagos (LOS)
Flt. Info Flight 587 17 hrs 45 min

Word,

B-Smooth

P.S. time is short, I expect a reply soon! We got a lot to do if we wanna leave today.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 14

B Smooth,

You can not waste money like that Instead get to Spain and call me from there.

Soki.

Prince Soki to B-Smooth, Oct. 14

B Smooth,

To come down here you will require more than $3000 , we need money to take care of the cargoes in Spain, better go to Spain, okay.

Let me send you the contact address and phone numbers so that you will have to be in Spain, it makes nosense spending $3,000.00 to deliver $1,000.00. You can send that via money gram okay.

Soki.

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Oct. 15

Soki,

Too late dawg, we already half way there. We got a shit load of money for you. We are going to party like kings. What is up brother? B-Smooth and I are in Amster DAMN yo! We never heard from you so we stayed here. You need to confirm who will meet us at the airport dude so we are not waiting there. Send Nicks and tell him to where the shirt so we know who to look for. Here is our new flight info:

Depart 12:30 pm Sat., Oct. 18, 2003 Amsterdam(AMS)
KLM
Arrive 5:55 pm Sat., Oct. 18, 2003 Lagos (LOS)
Flt. Info Flight 587 17 hrs 45 min

B-Smooth has got me all worried and shit. Nigga be smokin all sorts of hash and shit. There are so many fine ass bitches out here. By the way, do you know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese out here? Fuck it. I forgot.

Anyway, if I keep B-Smooth here any longer than Saturday he'll die of an overdose of booze, drugs, and women. I think B-Smooth gone crazy. Please confirm Saturday dawg. I'm in the Internet Cafe looking at porn so I'll be here for a few more hours.

Peace,

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Oct. 15

Mike.

You are becoming some how apprehensive of tho whole thing after taken all my photos. Any way, for us to proceed, I think you should contact Spain, then you should go to Spain, then I will make sure that the keys is sent before your arrival. When you get there, pay the charges, then you send me some money with which to come down to meet with you. You should open contact with the details below otherwise they will not talk to you.

Then you will call me when you have arrived Spain. You will only fly for about one hour and you will be in Spain.

Please, contact.

DAVID SMITH
DIRECTOR OF OPERATION,CARGO DEPARTMENT
GLOBAL NETWORK SECURITIES & FINANCE
MADRID-SPAIN.
TEL: +34669961936
FAX: +34667847509
E-MAIL:globalnetworksecurities@madrid.com

Soki

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Oct. 15

Soki,

What do you mean contact Spain? Dude, we are in Amsterdam waiting to come to you. Excuse my French Soki but this has turned into a GIANT BUTT-FUCK-A-THON. That's right, a butt-fuck-a-thon! I'm going to contact spain now by email because I can't figure out how to use the damn phone in Europe. Somebody is going to meet us somewhere damn it.

Pissed as a mother fucka,

Mike Banks aka "Black Mic - Bitch Honkey Killa"

PS - Did you know they put Mayo on french fries out here? That's some triffelin shit.

Black Mic to David Smith, Oct. 15

Dave Smith,

Prince Soki Mobutu has told me to contact you. My name is Black Mic and I am in Amsterdam with my partner B-Smooth. We need someone to meet us in Spain now at the airport. We have the money for the keys. Please advise as we will not leave Amsterdam without proper travel arraignments. If you need to reach Soki, contact him at these email addresses:

sokimobutu2003@win4wales.com,
sokimobutu@123.com,
sokimobutu@yahoo.com or
sokimobutu2003@yahoo.com

Peace,

Black Mic

Prince Soki to Black Mic, Oct. 15

Mike,

Money for the keys can not be the problem in Spain, we need to pay charges before we can be allowed to have the cargoes, you can not just depart from America to another country without clear definition of your journey.

Why are you guys acting in a funny manner, I am getting sick and tired of this, you are running all the way from America and now you are stock in Amsterdam without knowing what to do. Please, call the Dr Davis on the phone, it is cheap, the hotel attendants will help you and besides phone is phone anywhere. It is same process.

You would have planned with Davies , what if he is not in Spain and this time or may be too engaged to attend to you , what will happen.

Please, stay in your hotel, contact him and he will tell you what to do, then you will book for time to meet, and at time, the carges will be ready and you will have the cargoes.

Regards,

Soki.

David Smith to Black Mic, Oct. 16

ATTENTION MR BLACK MIC

DEAR SIR,

WE WISH TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR CONSIGNMENT HAS ARRIVED SAFELY
THROUGH OUR DIPLOMATIC CARGO.

IN VIEW OF THE ABOVE,YOU ARE HEREBY OBLIGED TO PROCEED TO OUR OFFICE IN MADRID
SPAIN FOR CLAIMS WITH THE FOLLOWING REQUIRMENTS:

1.PHOTOCOPY OF YOUR INTERNATIONAL PASSPORT OR IDENTITY CARD
2.CASH PAYMENT OF €15,850.00 COVERING OUR FREIGHT CHARGE,INSURANCE
AND AIRPORT CLEARANCE CHARGE FOR THE SHIPMENT.

YOU ARE ADVISE TO FURNISH US WITH YOUR TRAVEL SCHEDULE

WE LOOK FORWARD TO SERVING YOU.

YOURS FAITHFULLY,

DAVID SMITH
DIRECTOR OF OPERATION,CARGO DEPARTMENT
GLOBAL NETWORK SECURITIES & FINANCE
MADRID-SPAIN.
DIRECT TEL: +34669961936
E-MAIL:globalnetworksecurities@madrid.com

B-Smooth to David Smith, Oct. 16

David Smith,

Whattup, yo?

I am B-Smooth and we been the playas playing with Soki Mobutu, yo. We have been trying to do business with his ass, but between you and I and the liquor on the ground, that mothafucka ain't too bright. I mean, he is one retarded muthafucka. Anyway, how do you know him? Or is your arrangement purely buzzinizz?

Anyway, don't tell Soki we think he is a retard and all. We are planning on getting the consignment from you in Spain as soon as we leave Amsterdizzam! This place is just so fucking dope, nigga! To tell you the truth, I fucked up all over the bad M/F when we got here. For once Black Mic was pretty sane, yo. He just got real high and started surfing for hard core animal porn. I went all damn out! There are bitches and titties and spliffs everywhere, yo? Nigga, at 3:30 this morning the po po broke into my hotel room and told me to break up the party. I had a good 50 or 60 bitches in my room and I was singing them some R&B. It was so cool, though: you are not allowed to own it, you are not allowed to carry it, but check this out, this is the cool part -- even if the police in Amsterdamn stop you, it is illigal for them to search you! THIS PLACE IS IN--FUCKIN--TERNAL!!!

A'ight I am wasting time. We brought plenty o money, yo, but we were only told $1,000 from Soki. That mothafucka must be up to something cause now you are talkin' about 15 grand and shit! Explain!

Tell you what, lets take it out of the cases o' bling you guys are chillin with.

Peace,

B-Smooth (Balck Mic's financial partner)

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: At this point, we felt the scam was dragging on too long. So the Profanator thought up a great idea and wrote a fake warning letter to Nigerian 419 Scammers. He did a great job of actually writting in the typical 419 letter style. I sent it from my Heywood Jablome account so Soki wouldn't recognize the email address. We basically just wanted to see what would happen.

WARNING to Prince Soki, Oct. 21

SUBJECT: WARNING TO ALL NIGERIAN SCAMMERS.

TO: NIGERIAN 419 COALITION MEMBERS
RE: WARNING OF TRECHERY!

THIS IS TO INFORM ALL MEMBERS OF A NEW AND SICKENING HOBBY BY WESTRN WHITE PEOPLE. NIGERIAN SCAMBAITING!

DURING THE YEARS OUR PROFTABLE VENTURE HAS BEEN ONLY A LITTLE AFFECTED BY DECEITFUL WESTRENERS I REMEBER THE GOOD OLS DAYS OF EATING BUGGA WHILE FAXING UNTIL I WAD RICH AND CONTENETED NOW E-MAIL HAS GIVEN OUR MANY POTENTYI9AL CONTACTS A METHOD OF TAKING US WITHOUT SERIUSNEESS. A GROUP OF AMERICANS AND BRITISH MEN HAVE BEGAN TAKING OUR CONTACTS AND BUSINESS OPPURTUNITES AS A WAY OF MAKING FUN OF US IN NIGERIA. THEY MOCH OUR DESERVING TITLES AND WASTE OUR TIME

WE ALL WORK VERY HARD TO EARN US A RESPECTABLE LIVING WARNINGS SIGNS THAT YOU ARE NOT BEING TAKEN SERIUS ARE;

A CONTACT WITH A PHALLIC NAME INNABILITY TO WORK TRANSFER MODALITIES SUCH AS WESTERN U8NION STRAYING AWAY FROM BUSINESS AT HAND TO TALK ABOUT PERSONLAL MATTERS IDIOTIC PHOTOS SENT BY CONTACT THE REQUEST FOR IDEOT ANS SILLY PHOTOS OF YTOU HOLDING A SIGNS FAILURE FOR CONTAVT TO ARIVE AT AIRPORT CONTACT NEVER ANSWERING THE HAND PHONE

THEY ARE GETTING SMATRER DATY BY DAY AND SEEM TO ENJOY LETTING US KNOW WE HAVE BEEN COND OR FOOLES. IF YOU SUSPECT YOOU HAVE BNEEN VICTIME OF A SCAMBAITER IMMEDIATELY FEEL STUPID BECAUSE THEY PROBALY HAVE YOUR INDFORMATIONS AND PICTURE ONA WEBSITE SOMEWHEERDE.

RINGLEADE3RS OF THESE VENTURSES GO BY THE NAMES OF EBOLA MONKEY AD PROFANATOR. GOD PRAY THESE FOOLS WILL DIE INB HELL FOR THEIR LYING WAYS AND WE WILL BE ABLE TO GET BACK TO MAKINGB MONIES.

SINCERELY,
]
Heywood Jablome

YOU AMY MAIL ME WITH ANY QUESTIUONS AT hey_blome@hotmail.com

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Oct. 21

Soke-dog,

Whattup yo?

We are still waiting to hear from you or the security company!

Amsterdam is getting boring! Do you want to meet us in Spain or what, yo?

Your negro,

B-Smooth

David Smith to Black Mic, Oct. 21

ATTENTION: BENJAMIN HOROWICZ

SIR,

IN REFERENCE TO YOUR MAIL DATED 16TH OCTOBER 2003. I UNDERSTAND YOUR SITUATION. BUT I WANT TO CONFIRM FROM YOU IF YOU CAN AFFORD TO PAY OUR COMPANY BY WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER ONLY THE FREIGHT CHARGE OF 1,500€ SO THAT WE CAN DELIVER YOUR CONSIGNMENT TO YOUR NOMINATED ADDRESS IN THE NETHERLANDS.

AFTER YOU RECIEVE YOUR CONSIGNMENT, YOU CAN NOW PAY US OUR INITIAL SHIPMENT COST .

GET BACK TO US AS SOON AS POSSIBLE SO THAT I WILL SEND YOU THE NAME OF MY ACCOUNT OFFICER FOR THE PAYMENT.

I ADVISE YOU TO TRY TO BE MORE OFFICIAL IN YOUR WRITING TO ME .

LOOKING FORWARD TO SERVING YOU.

YOURS FAITHFULLY,

DAVID SMITH.

Black Mic to David Smith, Oct. 21

David,

Hi, it's Black Mic. Me and B-Smooth got your email and I think we understand what you mean about the official thing. You want us to be more studio gangsta than street gansta, right? It's hard for us because we wuz born in the streets and now that we got a little money, people always want us to change. My grandfather used to say "you can take the boy out the hood but you can't take the hood out the homeboy. Word."

Please tell us what to do next as we are just sitting around in Amster DAMN waiting. Also, have you heard from Prince Soki? His email is no longer working and we are worried.

Thanks

Black Mic

David Smith to Black Mic, Oct. 21

ATTENTION MR BLACK MIC

DEAR SIR,

IN REFERENCE TO YOUR MAIL. I WANT TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE THE AMOUNT TO BRING YOUR CONSIGNMENT TO YOUR IN AMSTERDAM.

DO WELL TO REPLY ME AS SOON AS POSIIBLE, I SOON AS I RECIEV YOUR PAYMENT, I WILL BRING YOUR CONSIGNMENT IN LESS THAN 24HOURS

YOURS IN SERVICE,
DIVID SMITH.

Black Mic to David Smith, Oct. 21

Hi Divid,

Is it David or Divid? I just noticed how you signed your name. I think I've been calling you the wrong name man. My bad. About the money. We got money but we've been here for a week. Partying is not cheap. How much in American dollars do we need? I'm sure we have enough but I want to be, ahh, sure. You know what I mean? Worst case scenario is we have my cousin Ray Ray wire us more money. This won't be a problem. Also, where will we meet? We are very excited about this.

Where is Prince Soki by the way? We can't get a hold of him. Is he OK?

Black Mic

David Smith to Black Mic, Oct. 22

ATTENTION MR BLACK MIC

DEAR SIR,

IN REFERENCE TO YOUR MAIL. IF YOU WANT ME TO BRING YOUR CONSIGNMENT IN ASMSTERDAM, YOU HAVE SEND ME 1,500€ WILL BE EQUIVELENT TO US$2,000.00

YOU HAVE TO WIRE IT FROM AMSTERDAM WITH THE NAME OF MY ACCOUNT OFFICER BELOW

MR GEORGE BAKER
SUR DE PLU
MADRID SPAIN.

YOU ARE ADVISE TO SEND ME THE WESTERN UNION TRANSFER INFORMATION.

AS SOON AS A RECIEVE YOUR PAYMENT, I WILL BRING YOUR CONSIGNMENT TO AMSTERDAM.

BE INFORM THAT YOU MUST TRANSFER YOUR PAYMENT FROM AMSTERDAM BECAUSE IF YOU ARE
TRANSFERRING FROM AMERICA, YOU CANNOT SEND MORE THAN US$500 BECAUSE OF NEW
MONETARY POLICY OF SPAINISH AND AMERICAN GOVERNMENT.

AS FOR PRINCE SORKI. I WILL CONTACT MY SECURITY COMPANY IN AFRICA TO GET HIS
EMAIL ADDRESS AND SEND TO YOU.

I WANT YOU TO DO THIS AS AMATTER OF URGENCY BECAUSE I HAVE OTHER OFFICIAL ENGAGEMENT TO ASIA NEXT WEEK. I WANT TO ENSURE YOU RECEIVE YOUR CONSIGNMENT BEFORE MY TRIP TO ASIA.

AS FOR THE WRONG SPELLING OF MY NAME, I UNDERSTAND. IT TAKES UNDERSTANDING AND PATIENT TO SERVE THE PUBLIC.

MAKE THE PAYMENT AND GET BACK TO ME AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

YOURS IN SERVICE,
DAVID SMITH.

Black Mic to David Smith, Oct. 22

Here's the deal David/Divid,

I have more than enough money to send. $2,000 is nothing. I'm concerned because it seems that our business partner has disapered. Soki's email address and we haven't heard from him. Something smells fishy and it's not the whores in the red light district of Amsterdam. When you get Soki in contact with us, I'll send you the money that minute. Please understand that I am only looking out for For-on Nine's best interest. We've done everything asked of us. We traveled to Amsterdam. You said be more studio gangsta and I did that. You even changed your name during our email exchanges and gave a strange reason. What does "understanding and patient to serve the public" have to do with changing the A in your name to an I?

Please respond soon as B-Smooth and I are tired of staying in Amsterdam and need to get back to the US.

Thanks

Black Mic

David Smith to Black Mic, Oct. 22

ATTENTION MR BLACK MIC

DEAR SIR,

IN REFERENCE TO YOUR MAIL, I AM DOING MY BEST TO HELP YOU.BUT I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE WAY YOU REASON. WELL I WAS ABLE TO COMMUNICATE WITH MY SECURITY COMPANY IN ABIDJAN.

HERE IS PRINCE MOBUTU EMAIL:sokimobutu20032003@yahoo.fr

THE MONEY IS NOT MY PRIMARY OBJECTIVE RATHER TO HELP YOU . BUT IT SEEM YOU DO
NOT APPRECIATE THIS FACT.

IF I RECIEVE YOUR PAYMENT, I WILL BRING YOUR CONSIGNMENT. I KNOW IT IS A LITTLE AMOUNT. THA IS JUST OUR CHARGES TO BRING YOUR CONSIGNMENT IN AMSTERDAM. DO NOT FORGET THA YOU WILL STIL PAY OUR INITIAL SHIPMENT CHARGES AFTER YOU GET YOUR CONSIGNMENT

I HAVE TOLD YOU BEFORE TO BE MORE OFFICIAL IN YOUR APPROACH. MY NAME IS DAVID SMITH AND NEVER DAVIES. I NEVER CHANGE MY NAME. CHECK MY FIRST REPLY TO YOUR MAIL AND GET THINGS STRAIGHT.

I WAIT FOR YOUR ACTING IN THIS REGARD.

YOURS IN SERVICE,
DAVID SMITH.

Black Mic to David Smith, Oct. 23

David,

Situation has gone from bad to worse dawg. If you know where Soki is, tell him to contact me immediately. B-Smooth is in critical condition at the Amsterdam hospital. We were at a brothel in the red light district last night and we were drinking 151. B-Smooth has been really missing Soki so he says "Ima pour out a little of dis here 151 for my boy Soki." This is a tradition that street gangstas do for their homeboys that can't be physically with them. So he pour the 151 out and some of it drips on his pant leg and shoe. It just so happened that he dropped the cigarette out of his mouth at the exact same time. Nigga went up like the Towering Inferno. He was flopping around screaming "heeeeellllllpppppp! somebody put me out." Rolling all around the bar and shit. It was horrible. Well, I grabbed a glass of Vodka and doused him with it thinking it was water. Big mother fuckin mistake! We finally put his ass out but he had to be rushed to the emergency room. Brotha got like 4 dimensional burns all over. That 151 shit is super flammable. I know that now.

Anyway, I need you to have Soki contact us immediately. Don't even think about acting like a bitch David, this is serious. I don't want to hear any "BUT I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE WAY YOU REASON" or shit like that. Get me Soki.

If he was ever a real friend, he'd come see his homeboy up in the hospital. Even Dr. Dre went to see Eazy E when he was dying. They had beef at the time too. Soki and B-Smooth and got no beef. Even if Soki sent a gift basket with a card or some shit like that. Just to say "sorry you went up in flames homie." I think this will lift his spirits and make a nigga want to pull through.

Damn, nothing worse than when a gangsta rapper lights himself on fire. Got my mind trippin dawg. I'm sorry for the language it's just that I'm totally stressed.

Please help.

Black Mic

Black Mic to David Smith, Oct. 23

David,

Any word on Soki yet. It apears that the story has been leaked to the press about the accident. Please email me right away. Mother fuckin reports got me ready to bust caps.

Black Mic


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 Home > News > Top News > Article


Gangsta Rapper a blaze, literally

Thu October 23, 2003 12:24 PM ET
AMSTERDAM, The Netherlands (Reuters)-- Gangsta Rapper B-Smooth, of the Los Angeles based Hip Hop duo, Foe-on Nine, has been involved in a serious drinking accident while in Amsterdam, according to sources including his fellow band member.

B-Smooth, (born Benjamin Horowicz) and his rapping partner Black Mic, aka Bitch Honkey killa, (Born Michael Banks) have been in Amsterdam awaiting the completion of an international business transaction, Black Mic Informed us yesterday. Although somewhat delusional, Black Mic was able to say that B-Smooth caught on fire while drinking 151 in honor of "our mother*expletive*ing nigga, Soke-dog, yo!"

B-Smooth is in The Royal Amsterdam Hospital receiving treatment for 3rd Degree Burns. Although in critical condition, he is responsive to stimuli, and while being admitted for treatment, was heard shouting: "how long does it take a mother*expletive*er to put a mother*expletive*ing Nigga out, yo?" He has been denied visitors.

B-Smooth and Black Mic have recently been the focus of several media sources for their combination of aggressive gangsta rapping and off stage antics. Foe-on Nine have risen in popularity in recent months, culminating in the signing of their first major record deal. The singles, Soki Be Our Nigga, and Lookin' For Bitches to Put Our Babies In have risen to numbers 8 and 6 in the charts respectively.

Black Mic is currently awaiting trial in a lawsuit with the Krispy Kreme donut franchise for allegedly beating a customer with donut mixing equipment. When questioned, Black Mic did it "cause I had a honkey to kill." B-Smooth is wanted for questioning by authorities over allegations of fathering more than 400 bastard children--young women are still coming forward.

When fans were asked why Foe-on Nine appealed to them after a recent show, one young lady said: "because they are so damn hot! I want me some of that Nigga'z action!" A second fan merely commented: "they know how it is between us and whitey."

~Amersterdam News Agency contributed to this report

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EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: The Profanator did such a great job writing up the fake news article that I felt I had to get it to David in the most realistic manner that I could think of. Then it hit me right in the face.

Black Mic to Prince Soki, Oct. 24

Soki,

You no contacting mother fucka. Where have you been my nizzey? In case you haven't heard, B-Smooth is in the hospital because he lit himself on fire while toastin to yo ass. You don't have the common courtesy to come visit or even send a care package saying "sorry to hear you lit yourself on fire." What kind of brotha are you? Busta! Fake ass gangsta. We even put you on the album cover and have been in contact with David.

If you even care, B-Smooth is making progress. I've been by his bed side helping him write a new rap which we will release as a single when we get back to the US. We figure we'd capitalize off all the media coverage. Word. The song called "Oh SNAP - B-Smooth is on Fire, Literally." Check the rhyme:


I said "damn I miss my nigga, Soki"
shootin 151 with black mic, my G.
We were hangin in the dizzam you see,
That's Amsterdizzam to you and motherfucking me.
I missed my nigga so bad, it was time to tribute,
so I poured a damn shot and grabbed my nuts in salute.
Black Mic offered me a toke from a newport menthol
and I lit that fucker up, dying to get mental.

Chorus-
Nigga lit up like a damn bonfire
b-smooth being smooth like being a live wire
Bitches on the brain and the 51 on his face
Nigga on fire all over the place

(BSmooth yelling -- Put a motherfuckin nigga out, yo!)

Well I raised my shot and Black Mic concurred
didn't know b-smooth was about to be burned.
Now the only burns I know are carpet burns on bitches
Black Mic only knows the burn of his honkey killing itches.
Before we shot I made a toast:
Soke Dog is my Nigga! What a motha fuckin Boast!
I pored some on the ground in front of the bitches
but I got the mothafucka all down my britches.
At the same fucking time, as if by fate,
I dropped my damn newport, I hope you relate.
In slow motion the shit went up, yo!
B-smooth filled the house with an orange glow...

All for my motha fuckin nigga Soke Dawg, yo!

Bitches on the brain and the 51 on his face
Nigga on fire all over the place
Yelling "Holla............. my boy's on fire"
Rolling on the floor like a damn car tire
Pour'd out a little liquor, now he's a little sicker
fine ass nurse treatin burns, b-smooth is gonna stick her
my nigga done gone and made a Molotov Cocktail out of himself
so when you see him with a cigi keep the 151 on the shelf
and be sure to keep yo distance, a good foot or a two
cuz when B-Smooth spills he's a fuckin human barbecue

Niggas be lighten they selves on fire and shit.

Busta Rhymes be saying "Come on girl, light yo ass on fire"

Real gangsta's be saying "Fuck that shit, I'm from the street! I light
myself on fire." We about to roast smores on my nigga.

Word

Listen Soki, if you want to get this money you better contact us and stop acting like a little white boy.

Black Mic

B-Smooth to Prince Soki CC to David Smith, Oct. 27

Dear Soki and David:

Congratulations!

I have been playing with Nigerian scam boys like you for a very long time. You are, without doubt, the absolute stupidest ever!

You see, my name is not B-Smooth, nor is it Benjamin Horowicz. My partner, going by the name Black Mike, is also hiding behind a fraudulant name. Much as you are, fuck-ass.

You see, you have been the victim of reverse scamming. If you go here

http://www.ebolamonkeyman.com/soki.htm

you will see all of our correspondence and even the stupid photos you took of yourself. Thousands of people are looking at you and laughing. You are such a boy.

Soki, I actually like you. Now, I know you are a bit thick (stupid) so I want you to concentrate really hard and try to understand this: You are terrible at scamming. David, or what ever the fuck your name is, your partner Soki is fucking incompetent. Have him shot at once.

What the fuck were you thinking when you went to the photograph place wearing a T-Shirt that said 419 on it?

Damn, I am at a loss guys... Tell you what, go and look at the website and then get in touch with me. I would love to hear you angry. But I would love more to kow what the fuck you were thinking.

Sincerely,

The Profanator (B-Smooth)

P.S. Are you guys gay? You seem it to me.

B-Smooth to Prince Soki CC to David Smith, Oct. 27

Come on shit heads!

It is Ok to be angry. I tell you what. I will insult you and then you can insult me back.

Here we go: You are both stupid mugus into ladyboy love.

The Profanator

Black Mic to Prince Soki CC to David Smith, Oct. 30

SILLY MUGU COWARDS!

How fucking stupid are you? Use your head! Come on now. I know the rhymes were amazing but what rapper would put your ugly looking face on the cover of their album. You wouldn't even put your picture on your own album cover.

Anyway, I'm not here to tell you how fucking dumb you are. The world knows that already. They've been laughing at you for over a month now. I actually wanted to give you some career guidance, free of charge. You are really bad at scamming. I ain't speaking ebonics here so when I say bad, it means horrible. You actually are an embarrassment to all the other scammers out there. I know 6 year olds that could pull this off better than you. You look like a really old version of Steve Urkel dude. You need to get out of the scamming business right now before you get yourself arrested. You are about as sneaky as a 2,000 pound elephant running through the streets of Nigeria. I'm sure you know what that looks like. Now ask yourself Sucki, is that very sneaky looking? NO! You get the picture. Quit scamming now. Get a real job and blend into society until you die. Nobody will miss you or care. Trust me on that one.

How does it feel to be on a website where everyone laughs at you boy? You should thank me because I just made you famous. Each day, my site gets over a thousand visitors and they laugh at how fucking stupid you are. Way to go Mugu!

You owe me bitch,

Ebola Monkey Man

EBOLA MONKEY NOTE: Well, it looks like we've closed another chapter. These mugus won't write back. You'd think they would be impressed with the effort. Oh well. It was time for the Profanator and I to leave the rap game anyway. Who know, if your unlucky, you might see Black Mic and B-Smooth rocking the mic in a scam near you. Internal!


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